Walking In Rest.

(By Thor Knutstad & Diego Cuartas)

Rest. We crave it. We rush to it. We plan how to rest in a furry of activity and we invest in it feverishly. But we misdefine it. Rest is not time off. Rest is not the weekend nor a break nor a vacation. Rest is actually my calling - daily. Rest must be my mindset. My friend Nate uses the phrase "walking in His Rest" as a statement of calling and command. When I walk in God's Rest, I do not bow to anxiety and fear. I do not seek power over situations that are out of my control. I do not fret over circumstances. Instead, I trust my God and entrust myself to Him. Rest, or unrest, displays who or what rules my very heart. It's almost Monday, but will you walk in His Rest? 

In A Pilgrim Song, found in the 131 chapter of the book of Psalms, we can see the relationship between rest and hoping in God: (The Message)

God, I’am not trying to rule the roost,

I don’t want to be king of the mountain.

I haven’t meddled where I have no business

of fantasized grandiose plans.

I’ve kept my feet on the ground,

I’ve cultivated a quiet heart.

Like a baby content in its mother’s arms, 

my soul is a baby content.

Wait, Israel, for God, Wait with hope.

Hope now; hope always!

Reflection:

• When do you experience the most rest?
• What role does God play in that rest?
• What would have to change for you to find rest in God?

Stepping Stones

by Dara Born (guest blogger)

It was a Wednesday morning, September 6, 2000. I sat in a hospital room surrounded by my family listening to my mother’s breaths become further and further apart. We were huddled around her bed telling stories and laughing. Nobody voiced it out loud, but I am sure we were all full of hope. Not the hope that my mother would soon fall into the arms of Jesus and be in glory for eternity, but rather the hope that we were going to get our miracle and my mother would be healed. Cancer free. Coming home. What we were praying for was good. It was righteous. God would grant us our desires, wouldn’t he? Nobody even noticed when my mom took her final breath. We were being silly, telling jokes…a typical “Terry” gathering. Our laughter was interrupted by Russell’s voice “I don’t think she is breathing anymore”…  

Me & Mom with "cancer-do"

A year earlier we learned my mother had breast cancer. At first I was shaken, deeply saddened and confused. Those feelings were quickly replaced. I began to tell myself “lots of people get breast cancer…it’s no big deal…she will be fine.” My mother was gentle and kind and loved God deeply. She had faith she would get better, therefore I was convinced she would get better. I gave myself permission not to think about it anymore. I started to attend CMA that year because my mom asked me to. I wanted to make her happy. It was during this time that God began to open my ears to His truths, His promises and His love. One week, Pastor Nate spoke about “drawing near to God and He will draw near to you.” It was many years since I felt close to God but I began to desire it. How? How do I draw close to God? 

…a nurse came into the hospital room. She checked for my mother’s pulse, pushed a few buttons on a machine and stepped quietly out of the room. My mother was gone. She was not healed. She was not cancer-free. She was not coming home. But even so, the room was filled with a strange sense of peace. It surrounded me. It hugged me. Is this what “a peace that surpasses all understanding” means? Is this God? 

Within a week I was back at work and trying to function in my new reality. I was still going to church and I was still wondering about “drawing near to God.” Then one week, Pastor Nate said, “use your struggles as stepping-stones, not stumbling blocks.”  Wow. Everything inside me screamed to grasp this, to understand it, to change my old ways, to allow God to give me new ways to handle pain. All the struggles in the last 10 years of my life appeared in my mind and I saw myself using each one to stumble deeper and deeper into a world of darkness. Then I saw myself in a new picture. I was using stepping-stones and climbing up. I whispered to Russell, “I want to do that. I want to use the stepping stones.”

                    Mom & I

So began a 13-year journey of me drawing near to God and God drawing near to me.  

In Pastor Greg’s sermon on Mother’s Day he said to allow God to take the old to birth the new. God took my old ways of negative self-talk, my old patterns of escaping pain and He showed me a new way. A better way. His way. 

By the way, my mother is healed. She is cancer-free. She is home. 

DONE

One of my classes informed me yesterday that they were officially DONE for the year. I teach Language Arts to high school seniors, so this wasn’t news to me. At this point in the year, the prom is way more important than poetry. Actually, pretty much ANYTHING is more important than poetry to these students.

My typical teacher answer was that just because they FEEL done doesn’t mean they ARE done. We still have plenty of school days left, whether they have the energy or motivation for them or not. Feelings don’t change the reality of the calendar.

This is an issue many of us face, sometimes daily. Being DONE. With pain, emotional and physical. With lousy circumstances. With uncertainty. With lives that aren’t what we want. Sometimes it’s just all too much: too relentless, too agonizing, too isolating.

But life and its demands move on regardless of the exhaustion. Jobs need to be done, houses need to be maintained, kids need to be cared for, bills need to be paid. There is no time to be at the end of your proverbial rope.

I have felt DONE many, many times lately. I have found the daily grind of work, home, and other responsibilities to be overwhelming in the middle of the difficult journey of grief and loss. Like my students, I have wanted to proclaim that I officially quit for the month, week, or year. 

As Pastor Greg has preached the past couple of weeks, I have been intrigued by the character of Hannah. Biblical characters are normally two dimensional to me, people who have done great things for God through their faith and goodness but are really too good to be real people. They are people I admire but can’t be.

However, taking a close look at Hannah’s grief experience has given me a new angle on which to view her. She, too, had the feeling of being overwhelmed with loss and sorrow. She was “done” as well…to the point of having no other option than to throw herself on the ground in prayer, weeping. As Greg stated in his sermon, hers was not a pretty situation or pretty prayer. It was messy and had no easy solution.

BUT Hannah throws herself on the ground in prayer anyway, despite the mess she is in. I cannot help but think of what I do when I am overwhelmed. Is prayer my first reaction to being “done”? Or is it a last resort after I have tried all of my other coping mechanisms and control techniques? Usually, I find myself trying to manage the situation before I go to serious prayer. I’m not willing to seek God first in what Greg called the “confusing in between,” that space where the purposes of grief and loss are unclear.  

And it isn’t that I don’t WANT to seek God. I don’t want to actively turn my back to Him. It is a matter of not prioritizing what needs to be first when everything gets to be too much to handle. Going to God in my grief and panic needs to be a default setting, an automatic reaction to stress and pain. That will only happen when I remember that everything that happens is under the jurisdiction of our loving God.

The only way to avoid feeling done is to go to the One Who has already done everything I need to live a fulfilled life under His grace, one day at a time.  

Nancy Vasquez

Pain and Loss: Learning How to Walk in it with 1 Crutch....What a Mess it can Be!

(By Lois Robinson)

I’m not sure if any of you have ever described yourself, your circumstances or your relationships as “What a Mess,” but I certainly have- just recently, as a matter of fact. And on the heels of that realization, I thought, “Gotta write a blog about this one!”

Below is a little summary of the set of circumstances that enabled me to have such an insight on my “beautiful moment of self messiness.” Maybe this can become a new diagnostic code in the DSM-V, who knows!

Along this physical journey there have been many twists and turns, a lot of unexpected developments and diagnoses, new specialists to meet with that I never dreamed I would have a need for, waiting rooms with people that are in deep levels of physical, emotional and psychological pain. All along, I’ve been trying to weigh how to live on mission in all these different venues God has allowed me to be in, with the very present reality of my own deep levels of pain and loss. 

About 9 months ago, my orthopedic surgeon let me know that I would have to be referred to a pain specialist in order to develop a plan to manage and control the high levels of pain I live in, with the right leg and back, due to the Arthrofibrosis/Ankylosis Disorder I have. It is a collagen disorder that causes my body to produce massive amounts of scar tissue each day, which I must battle on a daily basis to break adhesions, particularly in the knee itself. Due to this condition, my kneecap frequently gets scarred down, stopping the whole right leg from having any strength at all as muscles atrophy and reflexes stop. Therefore I am in the need of the crutch(es) constantly. There is no cure for this rare condition that was triggered at the time of my total knee replacement. All I can do is continue to have surgeries each year, if I so chose, to remove all of the scar tissue and free up the knee cap, so the leg can begin working again and build muscle back.  But that will trigger the scar tissue to build again from the surgery procedure. Some have had up to 15 surgeries to beat it. I explain all of this because some of you have been so kind to ask what is really going on while some felt uncomfortable asking.

So, as I went to my first pain specialist, I was VERY nervous. Though I kept saying verses, praying and talking it through with my community of people I surround myself, I was still very anxious. Here is a glimpse into my thought process. Maybe you can relate.

WHAT IF:

1. The doctor thinks I am crazy? 

2. The doctor blows me off when this is such a HUGE thing in my life?

3. The doctor really doesn’t understand and takes me down a wrong road?

4. The doctor acts like he gets it but doesn’t?

........and the list goes on and on and on......

Do any of you relate to this wonderful rabbit trail of WHAT IF’s?! Notice none of it was founded on truth of any kind. Also notice how much POWER I was assigning to the doctor, as if he were the only one who could SAVE ME in this. WOW! I’m just sayin’. What a MESS!

 So I went, and he was wonderful! He was very compassionate, listened to my story, reflected back that he showed he understood, made his recommendations and we both agreed to the plan. The plan was great! And it managed things as well as can be expected. I got levels of healing because of that experience.

I went each month, followed the agreed upon treatment plan with an added dry needling technique that the PA would perform into all the trigger points across my thoracic back area to control spasms. As I walked through the door last month, they informed me they didn’t take my new insurance which would mean I had to find a NEW doctor. UGH!

I also needed to follow up with my primary doctor, and the nice lady at the desk told me my primary had unexpectedly retired. I had him for 35 years. UGH!

I got new health insurance, needed a new pain specialist and a new primary doctor all at the same time!  What a MESS…or so I thought.

Well, as the story unfolds, I have honestly been so anxious inside from having to find the right doctors for my particular set of circumstances. It is not an easy task. But through it all I continued to pray for wisdom, discernment and  the right doctors, while I gathered recommendations and surrounded myself with community, leaning into Jesus and His promises. This last month was a very stretching time for me. The price of medications as well as doctor’s visits had climbed into triple digits each month. The new insurance had brought a whole new set of deductibles, etc. UGH? What a MESS…or so I thought.

You will hear it said over and over again here at LFA, “Jesus specializes in our MESSES!” This is a huge truth to hold onto. I know these things, teach these things, pray these things and believe these things. But somewhere deep inside me, I did not believe these truths; otherwise I would not have been giving so much power to the doctors and stressing so much.

This Hymn came to my mind today after I picked up new meds, saw the new pain specialist and made a first appointment with the new primary doctor:                      

1. What a friend we have in Jesus, all our sins and griefs to bear! What a privilege to carry

everything to God in prayer! O what peace we often forfeit, O what needless pain we bear, all because we do not carry everything to God in prayer. 

 2. Have we trials and temptations? Is there trouble anywhere? We should never be discouraged;

take it to the Lord in prayer. Can we find a friend so faithful who will all our sorrows share?

Jesus knows our every weakness; take it to the Lord in prayer.

 3. Are we weak and heavy laden, cumbered with a load of care? Precious Savior, still our refuge;

take it to the Lord in prayer. Do thy friends despise, forsake thee? Take it to the Lord in prayer!

In his arms he'll take and shield thee; thou wilt find a solace there.

What occurred was this:

1. Medications were reduced in price by 50% due to new insurance. Praise God!

2. New pain specialist visit was reduced in price by 50%. Praise God!

3. New pain specialist has new options to try as we go along to help manage pain better. Praise God!

4. Will visit new primary doctor in the next couple of weeks. Maybe I will update you on the blog next month!

Friends, it is not enough that God showed me where I was going wrong; I now must ask for forgiveness because it is sin in my heart that fears man and assigns them any kind of ability to save me. Only Jesus can do that, so that sin is idolatry. I must also actively take steps of repentance in these areas of anxiety and idolatry. It would be wrong for me to celebrate the insights without recognizing it as sinful patterns in my thinking that needs to be repented from.

What I do celebrate is these verses:

Romans 8:1- "Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus,"

James 5:16- "Therefore, confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective."

Blessings to you, Friends, and be a Blessing to someone else!

SUFFERING AND SANCTIFICATION

"Believing that great good arises out of great hardship, we can experience joy in adversity."

Read the whole post or watch the video here.

The Power and Perfection of the Word of God

(By Diego Cuartas)

I am drawn to the comparison between creation and the law of God. More specifically, between the perfection and effects of the Sun and the perfection and effects of God's revealed Word. The comparison between these two is unavoidable and very accessible to all humans. Perhaps there is more in creation that can help us know the character and nature of God than what we may realize on any given day. Looking at comparisons is helpful to us given that there is a tendency to be blind or be blinded by lesser realities. One of them being the fact that we are too easily satisfied--at least I am.

Let's look at the sun, not lietraly though. Is Psalm 19, the writer (the Israelite King David) tells us that that God has "set a tent for the sun" an he goes on to describe how this sun operates:

[the sun] comes out like a bridegroom leaving his chamber,
and, like a strong man, runs its course with joy.
Its rising is from the end of the heavens,
and its circuit to the end of them,
and there is nothing hidden from its heat.

The sun runs a circuit and it does it like a champion who is confident and joyful. Nothing threatens its purpose or role in the universe. Another observation is that the sun's presence is evident to all and it does not depend on what humans or the rest of creation thinks about it or in their ability to acknowledge it or accept it. Furtheremmore, the sun's influence is irresistible and nothing is hidden from its heat. Interestingly that the writer does not say from its light and heat. I supposed anyone can hide from the sun's light but not from its heat or ability to warm our earhtly globe.  I finding delightful that King David couches this dscription of the sun within the bigger context of a universe that has been created to declare the glory of God pouring "speech" through the amazing characteristics of created detail. He, as he does in describing the sun, emphasizes the fact that all of creation becomes another voice for God. A voice that speaks how glorious God, the Creator is.

Let's turn now to the Law of God with a warning in mind: the sun will seem considerably smaller when compared to the spoken and revealed Law of God. Consider these verses:

7The law of the  Lord is perfect, reviving the soul;

the testimony of the Lord is sure,

making wise the simple;

8 the precepts of the Lord are right,
rejoicing the heart;

the commandment of the Lord is pure,
enlightening the eyes;

9 ...the rules of the Lord are true,
and righteous altogether.
10 More to be desired are they than gold,
even much fine gold;
sweeter also than honey
and drippings of the honeycomb.

11 Moreover, by them is your servant warned;
in keeping them there is great reward.

It is amazing what we can experience as we interact and apply our minds and hearts to what God says. The Word God speaks has the power to make places of our soul alive. The presence of sin has a way of numbing or killing things God intends to be alive in us.

The Word of God transforms my simple knowledge into wisdom. The presence of sin has a way of blinding me to self, God and others. Furthermore, it causes me to misinterpret the situations I face on a daily basis.

The Word of God brings true joy to my soul. The presence of sin combined with my limited humanity often drives me to see life in a hopeless way or in a very temporal-bound hope way.

The Word of God helps me to see reality as God sees it, from where He sees it. The presence of sin disables my capacity to see well. I don't mean disabling as if we did have at some point the same capacities God possesses with regards to knowledge, but more in the sense that if humanity could consistently live under God's authority and His Word perhaps we would see more accurately as a pattern.

The Word of God pronounces and decrees and activates what is the best and most worthy in the whole creation. The presence of sin corrupts my heart into thinking that I know what is best or I can determine what is best for me.

Lastly, the Word of God warns me and paves the way for a great reward. Reward in two ways: the reward of experiencing God's best for my life and others as well as the reward of God himself. The presence of sin has a way of making me live in the moment and the pleasures or safeties of the moment without consideration of what my choices can bring about. That same sin presence of sin bends my heart towards immediate rewards that are so often meager crumbs of life.

For further thought...

1. which voice or voices have most influence in your day to day life?

2. what do that voice or voices promise to you?

3. how do that voice or voices compare to what Psalm 19 says about God's voice?

4. what results do you see in your life as you follow your own voice or voices of your choice?

A Little Perspective

I have a secret.  It's not something I'm proud of, and it's not something I tell too many people.  OK, deep breath... I have been listening to conservative talk radio.  It's been going on for a few months now, ever since football season ended.  But it's not what it seems, I promise.    

I have been thinking a lot lately about perspectives.   How do seemingly intelligent people, armed with the same facts about any given subject, come to polar opposite conclusions? How can very smart people be atheists, and other very smart people be Christian, not to mention all the very smart people of other religions.  Or take any number of issues in politics.  Passionate people on both sides of the argument seem to have the same end goal in mind, but the debate quickly becomes a name-calling contest, with both sides accusing the other of being out of touch and ignoring the facts.  The level of vitriol that exists in politics almost negates any positive influence it may have. 

Like I said, I have been listening to talk radio lately, but is not something new for me.  I used to listen pretty often, and at that time, I largely agreed with the opinions being broadcast.  A lot has changed since then, and my social and political views have shifted pretty dramatically.  So listening to it again gives me a whole new perspective on some issues that I thought pretty much every intelligent person agreed on.  I'm not going to go into any of those issues (sorry political people), but I do want to share what I've learned about myself and about perspective in general. 

I realized pretty quickly, as I was yelling at my radio, that it's tough to love someone if you think they are an idiot, or more precisely, if you don't value and respect their opinions. And it is very difficult to value opinions if they are the opposite of your opinions.  Our natural tendency is to dismiss them as wrong, without much further thought or insight.  Everyone should agree with me, because I'm right. The funny thing, for me at least, is that my own opinions have changed over the years.  What I felt very strongly about a few years ago, I now believe the opposite.  I find that I can identify with the guy on the radio, even if I think he's wrong, because I was once where he is.  Believe it or not, keeping this in mind really helps to see where he is coming from, even if I don't agree with him. 

I often see Christians who lack perspective.  Hard line anti-this or that, up on their moral high horse, making it look like Christ's love is the last thing on their mind.  When we are so opposed to some amoral behavior, we often lack the perspective to say, "I was once where he is." If you intend to follow Jesus, then your desire to have people behave morally must be secondary to your desire to love them.  Remember Jesus socializing with sinners?  He knew that loving them would make a difference in their lives, so he didn't care what the religious leaders thought.  They were concerned with making sure everyone followed the rules and morals of society. 

Recognizing that we've all been there, in the exact condition that the people we are looking down on, brings a sense of perspective.  "Love the sinner, hate the sin" is a favorite saying of the morally superior crowd, but moral superiority very often gets in the way of loving people.  I wonder if Jesus would have eaten dinner with those people that Christians tend to marginalize, like atheists, LGBTs, drug addicts, adulterers, illegal immigrants, Muslims, drunks, prostitutes.  If we keep them at arm's length, while Jesus embraces them, how can we say that we are sharing the love of Christ?  

Jeff Hyson

To Face or Not to Face?

(By Tammy Vaughn)

I have been pondering the reasons that people choose to face their emotions or suppress their emotions.  I’ve listened to friends’ conversations and have noticed lately that many people suppress emotions and/or deny their feelings. People are generally proficient in talking about the facts of a particular situation but are not in touch with their feelings.  Instead, they choose not to delve into the emotional side of the situation.  It’s easier to talk about someone or something than take responsibility for how you feel.

Some may ask, “How do you know when a person is suppressing their feelings?”  I’ll answer the question with an example:  If someone calls an overweight individual “fat,” most likely it will cause some kind of negative reaction or feeling within the person targeted, whether that is embarrassment or hurt.  To say that it does not cause some kind of feeling is probably not likely or realistic.

There are times when a person does not realize that they are suppressing feelings.   This often happens when people do not take deep self-inventory.  They may be unwilling or unable to take the time to mine-out their deepest emotion.  Many people are fairly good at identifying happiness, sadness or anger.  However, that same group of people may not be so keen on identifying the varying intensity of their emotion.  For example, a more intense form of sadness could be depression.  A more intense form of anger is rage.  There are varying shades of basic emotions.

Some may deny that they are experiencing a particular kind of an emotion that is affecting them negatively.  This denial often happens because they feel embarrassed about the emotion.  They may feel like they are not entitled to feel the way they do.  Some people seem to be very concerned that if they give themselves permission to feel the emotion, they will not be able to actually deal with it.  According to James Gross, a scientist who studies emotions, “Suppressing emotions is hard to do and does not work.”  His studies have shown that once the emotion is triggered, it is very difficult to shut it down or ignore it. In fact, we become more tense and agitated while trying to suppress or ignore the feeling.  This shows that it is not emotionally healthy to suppress emotions.  Another negative implication of shutting off emotion is that people closest to us can tell we are suppressing our feelings; our non-verbal communication gives clues that we are hiding emotions, even when we insist on saying we’re fine.   In other words, in many cases we are not fooling anyone but ourselves.  This can actually do damage to the people we love; they end up feeling shut out because they know that we are experiencing feelings but are not willing to share them.

So, if it is not beneficial, what is the purpose of shutting down emotions?  What does a person hope to accomplish?  Often times, the person who shuts down or shuts off their emotions hopes that this action will make them appear to be strong in their vulnerable time of weakness.   This reminds me of the beautiful Bible verse that says, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” (2 Corinthians 12:9 NIV)

Other times people hope that by suppressing their emotions they can calm themselves down or help defuse a delicate and/or explosive situation.  The person does not wish to cause waves or cause a fight.  It does not usually accomplish what they want.

Usually feelings that are stuffed down come out in ways we do not want and at times we do not want.   Often we handle stuffed feelings in ways that are not helpful to us.  Stuffed feelings can be motivators to very negative behaviors or habits like substance abuse, physical and/or verbal abuse, etc.  However, when we give voice to our emotions we actually give validation to how we are feeling.  We feel grounded and more in control.  Healthy discussions about your emotions is just that, healthy.  It actually helps to bring your feelings to the light, which makes you better able to identify and deal with the source of the emotion.  If you can recognize the emotion, you can deal with the emotion.  You can respond to the situation as opposed to just reacting like a puppet on a string or a slave to a master.  Have you ever met a person who is ruled by their emotions?  If they feel a certain way then they have to act a certain way, never realizing that they may be a slave to their “un-dealt with” emotions.  Galatians 4:6-8 says, “Because you are his sons, God sent the Spirit of his Son into our hearts, the Spirit who calls out, “Abba, Father.”  So you are no longer a slave, but God’s child; and since you are his child, God has made you also an heir.  Formerly, when you did not know God, you were slaves to those who by nature are not gods.”  Our emotion, while important and valid, are NOT God.  And we should not be a slave to them.

Many things we suppress are not able to be processed by ourselves because we are stuck in our emotion.  At these times it’s advantageous to seek out professional counsel and begin to learn how to express those feelings and get them out in the open, aided by someone we trust.  Even the expression of those feelings to a close loved one is beneficial because it allows others to express care and empathy.  No one really wants to be burdened and suffer through a rough time alone.  Nor should they have to.  Open communication is one of the ways a person experiences a loving relationship.  Sharing your heart with someone you trust can greatly strengthen that relationship.  In the end, giving our loved ones a chance to show us they care and that they can be with us/there for us is actually a gift to them.

How Do I Deal With Shame From My Past?

What a great opportunity to deal with the reality of personal shame by having looked at the Cross during Easter. If your sense of shame still is lingering and it reaches back into your past, I recommend you listen to this video blog and consider the book "Shame Interrupted" by Ed Welch. Any tool that will help you understand the roots of that shame as well as how is it that Jesus addresses it in the most effective way is worth your time and resources. Here is a quote I want to put before you to "wet your appetite" for more liberating grace:

Here is the challenge. Your shame is about human relationships. What do other people think of you? Where can you fit in? Even now you could wonder, what does God have to do with this? The things God says are good, but they don't seem connected to the deeper issues. For example, if you are a public failure, it is good that parents or friends love you , but that love doesn't touch the rejection you experience. The love doesn't take away the failure. The acceptance of the King [Jesus], however, coupled with the knowledge of how to live before him, will diminish the power of shame. Other people might not yet recognize that your public failure has been replaced by kingdom humility and honor, so you still might hear a few mocking voices. But those voices can't reach as deep, and they certainly won't last. (page 148)

Click here to listen another thought the author of this book offers to us.

Did You Know About Spy Wednesday?

David Mathis, through his well-written blog at desiringgod.org will help you transport yourself to the different key events that took place leading up to Jesus' betrayal by Judas. His blog is another piece you can use to bring focus to your heart around the Cross and the Passion Jesus demonstrated in laying His life down for us. Click here to read the blog!

Failure Is (Not) An Option

It’s been a rough month.

It started with the flu. I woke up on Sunday morning one week and was a coughing, feverish, shaky mess. I decided after two days that being sick was not an option for me and dragged myself to work. It took me about ten minutes to realize that “mind over matter” wasn’t going to work. I was sick. Really sick.

Failure #1.

Yes, the flu was a failure to me. I couldn’t will it away. I was caught in its grasp until the virus ran its course. I had no control. I couldn’t work or be productive in any way. 

Upon my return to work, I realized that I was seriously behind on EVERYTHING…lessons, grades, other assorted paperwork. I sheepishly assured my bosses that I would get caught up within the week.

Failure #2.

Yes, being behind was a failure, too. I live to appear competent and in control. Now I didn’t look like either one. It felt terrible.

But I put a plan together. I would be in control once more! I plowed through my work, got things done. I had the perfect plan to be done by the deadline I gave my bosses, and it was HAPPENING. My world was in order once again.

Until I woke up that night with the unmistakable symptoms of either the world’s nastiest stomach bug or food poisoning. I’ll spare you the details, but you can imagine that the next day was not productive as far as work. 

I was still behind. Failure #3.

I eventually made my deadline by the narrowest of margins, but everything else in my life was out of order: my house, my relationships, my budget and tax filing. All had been neglected thanks to my illnesses and the zeal to get my work life together.

 I tried to get it together once again. I was filing my tax return…and reality hit. I made a mistake. A big mistake. A mistake that cost me a lot of money. I calculated, recalculated, researched. Yup. I had underestimated my taxes, and it was too late. I had to pay up with my savings. 

Failure #4. I NEVER make mistakes with taxes. Ever.

I spent a good part of that day curled up in a ball of defeat. My life had become, in my view, a disaster. Nothing was going well. Nothing. I kept asking God, What is this? A joke? A punishment? What are You doing here? I don’t get it.

And I’m still not sure I get it completely, but I’m seeing a pattern throughout all of these “failures.” Each one is based on an expectation of perfection from myself. I need to appear in control of my life at all times.  Mistakes and weaknesses are not OK.

During the current sermon series on The Everyday Gospel, we’ve learned a lot about limits and boundaries. It’s a different world entirely from the perfectionism I strive for. The idea that God deliberately sets limits on our lives is one that is far, far away from performance based Christianity. Thinking about God this way turns the events of the last month completely around.

 If I begin to think that all of these “failures” are really a part of God’s plan to shape me and limit me where I need limiting, then my attitude automatically refocuses on Him, not myself.

I’m just starting to really grasp some tough but important Truths: That life’s failures don’t define me. That circumstances beyond my control, like the flu, are not reflections of my weakness. That setbacks don’t break me. That mistakes happen and are survivable. 

And most importantly, that a gracious God is in charge of everything.

Nancy Vasquez

My Top Ten List for Thoughts on Beauty

    My daughter Ava is three years old, and she just loves to wear dresses. Everyday she asks me, “Mommy, can I wear a dress today?” And I usually let her wear one. But recently, she’s started asking me a new question each time she puts on a dress. She heads to the mirror and asks, “Mommy, don’t I look pretty now?”

    It breaks my heart to see my daughter starting to enter more fully into the lifelong relationship every woman has with beauty: a relationship both with their own beauty and with what the world says about beauty. As a mom, I so wish I could protect her. I wish I could download and program into her little mind a philosophy about her image that would spare her the hurt and struggle that women go through in this area.

I know I can’t. But IF I could, I’d use my little ‘brain programming software’ to instill these top ten convictions that I’ve come to (through a lot of suffering) into her little heart (but minus the suffering).  

Sarah’s Top Ten List 

for what I’d want engrained in my daughter’s heart about Beauty

1. We tend to think that the way beauty works is that there’s a specific list of qualifications that you have to cross off a list in order to obtain it. Either you have beauty or you don’t. In our culture, we’ve established a definition of beauty: being skinny, having a good figure, certain facial features, the niceness of our house, the trendiness of our clothes, and so on and so forth. However, I’d want my daughter to come to realize that our definition of beauty is NOT the same as God’s. God made women, (and I do mean ALL women) to be beautiful. That’s just the way we are. We possess it; beauty is in our essence. I sometimes already tell my daughter Ava, “You’re so pretty. Guess what? So is your sister Bethany. So is your Nana. So is Mommy. Your friends Myla and Bristol are pretty, too. Every girl you see around you is pretty. God just made girls to be pretty. That’s just the way they are.”
2. Why are women beautiful? Well, the reason we are beautiful is because GOD is beautiful. In the beginning, when God decided to make people, He decided to display His image in people. He made two genders to display different characteristics of Himself, and a dominant thing He designed women to display about Himself is…beauty. So, if you’re a woman, you can’t NOT be beautiful. It’s like a birthright. We’re born into it. It’s just who you are: you ARE beautiful. Because God is beautiful. 
3. I don’t need something else to make me beautiful. I am beautiful. Period. Clothes don’t make me beautiful. Being young doesn’t make me beautiful. Makeup doesn’t make me beautiful. Being ten pounds skinnier doesn’t make me beautiful. There’s not an equation that says ‘Me + <insert something else, such as a bigger chest, or makeup, or the cutest clothes> = beautiful.’ No! If there’s any equation, it goes ‘Me + NOTHING = beautiful.’ And, again, it’s because of God, The Beautiful One, making women to display His image, that we’re beautiful.
4. Also. My beauty can never be defined in comparison to someone else. The beauty that’s on MY life is personal, particular, and unique. It’s not an ideal cultural list of criteria. It’s a gift from God. For example, has this ever happened to you: you feel good about your outfit until you reach the party that you’re going to, and all of the sudden, you hate what you’re wearing? It’s happened to me too many times. Or recently, I’ve been working on exercising daily and I feel good about my body getting more in shape. But I can feel like a fat, ugly blob when I see someone who is skinnier than I am. Or have you ever tuned in to notice the images everywhere in our world that are screaming at us what it means to be beautiful and what standards we have to achieve? But my beauty can never be defined in comparison to someone else. It can’t be measured by our culture’s definitions. My beauty can only be defined in relationship to God. 
5. The Beautiful God has specific reasons for making beautiful women. He has purposes for our beauty! He wants our beauty point people to Himself. My beauty is not a chance to prove to everyone that I’m the best. But we’re like little wildflowers who might make someone think of the Creator. Our beauty is to point back to Him. That’s kind of theoretical. But here’s a purpose that’s pretty tangible: our beauty is supposed to create a safe place for other people. Our tendency is to use our own beauty to make ourselves feel safe. But God gave it to us to make others safe. 
6. How do we use our beauty to make ourselves feel safe?? It can look so many ways. It’s a pretty sneaky temptation, in my opinion. For example, I’ve struggled so often with having the wrong motives for making my house cute and well decorated. A good word for what it feels like deep inside is striving. And I do that striving to prove to myself that I’m feminine enough, a good enough woman. And I’ve wanted friends to think the same. I used the gifts of my personal taste (which IS beautiful) to find a sense of security in my identity. Or I’ve certainly picked out clothes to make myself feel safe. I’ve thought if I’m trendy enough, I’ll be wanted as a friend. Or I won’t be rejected. And I’ve been afraid that I’m ugly and I’ve worn makeup to cover up my face to give myself a sense of security. I’ve striven to be skinny thinking that if I weigh more than I’d like to, I’m scary place where I might lose something valuable…my security. It’s like I’m trying to save myself from the scary place of being unwanted or unloved by being beautiful enough, both in what I look like and in who I am. 
7. What will it feel like for other people when I follow the temptation to use beauty for my own safety? Well, it will hurt them. I’m actually going against the design that God has for my life. I’m actually creating more unsafe places and feelings for others. When we strive after the ideals of needing to be skinny, having a perfect house, never aging, and so on, we’re perpetuating the lie that beauty is a list of criteria. We’re just one more voice saying that you can’t rest in who God made you to be. You have to change the way you are and strive, strive, strive, to try to grasp an illusive security that will never actually feel safe. The Biblical term would be that we’re encouraging others to chase after ‘false gods.’ I can think of an extreme example of this: think of an actress who is playing a role in a movie that includes nudity. If you’re watching a movie with a sexual scene in it, and you’re next to your husband, do you feel safe? Nope. You feel very unsafe…and compelled to strive harder so that you can be safe in an unsafe world. The actress is using her beauty in a way that’s attempting to secure some kind of safety for herself (fame, the label of ‘sexy,’ etc) and it creates an unsafe environment for the rest of us. It’s going against the design for a woman of creating safety.
8. So now that I know that I’ll be tempted to use my beauty to secure safety for myself…but that God’s design is for me to make others feel safe…how can I do that? What does it look like? Well, one thought I have is that it looks like putting limits on myself in the area of beauty. We’ve heard some sermons about this idea of limits on Sunday mornings at LFA, and I think it’s very applicable to beauty! For example, we learned 3 ways we can know we need to impose a limit on ourselves. The first was if I’m trying to be more than human. That’s certainly applicable to beauty. We have the pressure to try to: live up to a supermodel standard of appearance, lose ‘baby weight’ at a super-human speed, keep an immaculate house, stay looking as young as I did when I was 21, keep the same body that I had pre-babies, always look perfectly put-together, and on and on and on. Or the two other ways we can know we need a limit were if we’re trying to live someone else’s life (do you have an ‘arch-nemesis’ that you’re always trying to live up to?), or when we just want something too much (being skinny? a bigger house? pottery barn furniture? perfect family pictures? no wrinkles? a six-pack by summer?). When we find tendencies such as these in ourselves, it’s a GREAT time to impose a limit on ourselves.
9. And what might a limit on myself look like? It might look like coming to terms with my post-babies body and being kinder to myself in my movement towards health instead of striving so hard to be as skinny as possible. It might look like a more balanced, calm approach to my diet. It might look like changing my focus from a perfect house (that I’m trying to get to prove my identity), to creating a house that will feel safe and welcoming to people who enter it. In fact, getting that welcoming and safe feel might have more to do with me working on myself and who I am on the inside and how much I’ve listened to the Hoy Spirit’s desires for this person than with my actual house. It might even look like using my energy to get people into my house, aka using my energy to look for who I can love and get to know. A limit could look like choosing not to wear something immodest that looks great on me. It could look like not dressing as trendy as I possibly can and being more normal. A limit can look so many ways, but it will create a safe place for other people, a refusing-to-strive-place. 
10. One other way of using beauty to make others feel safe is kind of the opposite of imposing a limit. It’s intentionally offering who I am. When I hide and try to change who I am, it’s yet again trying to manipulate safety for myself. But a woman who trusts that God has made her beautiful, both inside and out, and that who she is will be a gift to those who get to know her because God made her and God lives inside of her, will be a gift of safety to people. She’ll be emanating rest. There will be a lack of striving. She’ll be a safe place that points others back to God. When she is restful in the way God made her, believing that she is innately and uniquely beautiful, she can proactively use her beauty to minister to a hurting and confused world. She has nothing to prove. 

So there you have it. My top ten list for thoughts on beauty. Unfortunately, I don’t have a secret brain programming software. But even so, I do pray that God would give my daughter Ava, me, and also you, grace to walk in His design for beauty. 

Sarah Howard

Big Question! Where does it say Jesus Hopped??

(By Lois Robinson)

Growing up, Easter was always a big deal in my house. I would look forward to getting my new fancy Easter outfit, which included a little white hat, purse and little black patten leather shoes. The night before Easter, I would dream about what would be in my Easter Basket , how big it would be and what kinds of candy it would be stocked with. I always wanted the biggest chocolate bunny!! The song was always a favorite as well....

“Here comes peter cottontail, hopping down the bunny trail, hippity hoppin’, Easter’s on its way....”  Easter day would come, we would dress in our fancy Easter clothes, sit in “our” seat in church, sing the standard “easter” songs, hear the same ole message about this guy Jesus died on the cross and came back to life in 3 days and so on and so on. All we looked forward to was getting out of there, eating candy, the big Easter dinner that only came once a year and the Easter Egg Hunt that would follow. Yay, let the party begin. The Jesus thing was a formality that had to be acknowledged but the Easter bunny, Easter dinner and the Easter Egg Hunt was what it was all about for me. That is what I was taught. I even remember that the church Easter program had the Easter bunny hop right up the center isle of the church as everyone sang the hippity hoppin' song.

Let me not fail to mention, I was raised in a “Christian” home. 

          As I am writing this blog, very real emotions rise up inside of me of anger, sadness, confusion. Two of the most significant events in history , one being the birth of Christ and the other being the work He did on the Cross and His Resurrection......diluted down to a party involving food, an imaginary figure and a gift. Oh God, please forgive us.

Another set of emotions I am experiencing are humbleness, thankfulness and comfort. You may be asking how can I feel such contradicting emotions at once. It is very possible.....as you look below the surface you will find out:)

I am so thankful that as I have gotten older, failed a lot more and learned from those things, Jesus has shown me deeper truths about the Cross and His resurrection. I used to think it was a one time thing when I got saved but it is an everyday thing. Everyday I am a sinner, but everyday I must remember that my status changed on that Cross because of Jesus. Not because of WHO I am or WHAT I’ve done . It’s all because of WHO JESUS IS AND WHAT JESUS DID AND WHAT HE IS CURRENTLY DOING AND WHERE I FIT IN HIS STORY!

The more I get nearer to Him and He gets nearer to me, I am reminded of how ugly my sin was and is. When that reality really sets in, the Cross of Christ and His Resurrection evokes deep emotion in me. When I literally allow my defenses to drop, get quiet before Him, think of the UGLY things I have done and been apart of by choice.... and some not by choice.....and to know He literally died for all of that willingly without me even asking Him to do that for me......and then on top of that......GOT BACK UP IN 3 DAYS in order to give me the victory everyday over all those ugly things that held me down.....WOW!!!!!!! How can that not give you chills!!!

So, I am not presenting a challenge this time. I am giving a directive this time. Please do not make Easter all about the stuff I mentioned in the beginning of this blog. None of it served to bring me life, forgiveness or freedom. I am not anti- food, anti -eggs, anti- rabbits, anti- candy or anti -gifts. But I am anti-idolatry. Whenever we make anything or anybody bigger than the One who is to be Celebrated...........it leads to bondage. How you may ask:) Using my own experience from the beginning of this writing, since the primary emphasis in my family was on the party, the food, the basket and the egg hunt, the “life or emotional high”  I experienced from the celebration was over by the next day. It was a form of entertainment without substance or truth. So when I encountered hard times later in life, I had virtually no understanding of why Jesus really had to die, what significance that had on my sin/circumstances and how His resurrection impacted my ability to break out of patterns of daily brokenness and sin. That is a HUGE reality I never learned as a child because “Easter” was  about everything else but Jesus and the work He did for me and everyone else on the Cross. Consequently then, I walked around in bondage for a long time without knowing the true reality of Easter and its implications for my life. The Freedom that was waiting for me based on the Reality of the Cross. I tried many many things to experience freedom and none worked for longer than a day...if that. But, when I got serious about Looking below the surface ..........I began to learn what the Significant event of Easter was and IS all about. Amen

Know what you are celebrating and why you are celebrating it!

How To Cope With Suffering?

(By Diego Cuartas)

Suffering is such a part of our human existence and though this is the case the presence and experience of it still affects us and shapes us in ways beyond our calculations.  Suffering remains a purposeful reality within God's plans for our lives. Therefore, it is important that we lean on a godly framework to face it and walk through it. Today, I want to share a good resource produced by Ed Welch, from CCEF, on this topic. May God use it to encourage you and bless you in the difficult places of your life.

Click here to read this article on "Ten Things to Do During Suffering".

The Freedom of Limits

This past Sunday was an exciting day for me because my brother and sister in law dedicated their baby daughter in the second service. Ara Faith is pretty much everyone’s favorite person right now and it was incredibly special to stand up there with Dan and Holly as they declared that Ara belongs to God. 

I thought that was that, but after the service I started connecting the dots between Ara’s dedication and Nate’s sermon about knowing our limits and how God wants the gospel to shape our limits. 

It’s so easy to take what God calls our limits and call them something else instead- like failure or incompetence or not trying hard enough. We’re a culture of go-getters and nothing is supposed to be able to stand in our way. Of course, that isn’t how it really works and we end up discouraged and frustrated, always a few steps away from the life we think we’re supposed to have or the person we think we’re supposed to be. 

Despite that reality, finding freedom in my limits still seems like a ridiculous contradiction. I think it’s because I usually associate freedom with independence, and independence means I control everything and never have to give up. (I’m pretty sure that kind of thinking reveals that being American shapes my theology more than the Bible does, but that’s a WHOLE OTHER STORY.)

Okay, back on track- finding freedom in our limits. I can’t think of a better practical example of the joy and blessing that comes from knowing your limits than what I saw in Ara’s dedication. I loved seeing the tangible action that Dan and Holly took because they know they cannot give Ara everything she needs. They cannot completely protect her; they cannot shape or control her or her life to make it perfect or happy. They acknowledged that reality and gave her back to God and in doing so they experience the freedom of not having to perfectly accomplish those things alone. 

I’m not a parent but I do know that nothing is ever that easy and simple. But I think maybe that’s the beauty of knowing your limits. Limits don’t mean the end of everything, they’re just the end of our capabilities and the place God can step in and do something more. 

I’m excited to begin this process of embracing my limits – not as failures – but as opportunities to step out in faith and know that God will meet me there. 

Jessica Noblett

The Heart Of Approval

(By Thor Knutstad)

Sometimes we so desperately need each other's approval.  Unfortunately, fear and worry are so connected to how much we crave approval and how much we hate failure.  Whatever you think you need will always control you.  If you need love and acceptance and approval from others, they hold the keys to something very valuable to you.  You will live in fear that they might not deliver.  You will fear those who are the gatekeepers to the fulfillment of your needs.  This can control your heart, your conversations, your goals and even your relationships.

The opinions of other human beings are by far the scariest things on the planet.  Our formula for avoiding rejection deceives us into thinking that we can win the approval, the prestige or the love that we desire.  But God doesn't want us dominated by the opinions of other people.  His approval, by far, is all that we really need - and we have that in the Gospel of the Lord Jesus Christ.  You see, God the Father approves of the work His Son Jesus did - and that changed and changes everything.  God's approval reigns over me because of my Savior - not because of others and not because of my performance.  I can rest in this great truth. Praise Him.

Good Intentions Awareness

Last fall, during Breast Cancer Awareness Month, pink was all the rage.  Working in a school, I noticed several coordinated days where staff and students wore pink ribbons, bracelets, or other articles of clothing.  I wondered if the students knew why they were wearing pink, so I asked an 8th grade boy.  "It's for breast cancer," was his response.  Cancer awareness is a noble cause, but is awareness enough?  Is wearing pink really helping anything?   

Before you answer, consider this:  Giving money to cancer research and wearing pink both have the same effect on the person doing the action.  We feel good about ourselves, we feel like we have done our small part to help, and, more importantly, we feel absolved of any further responsibility, at lease until next year.  But doing something noble that costs us nothing, and doing something noble with some personal cost are not equal. 

I was talking with an old friend recently, whom I hadn't seen in quite a few years.  I knew from our limited Facebook interactions that he had been involved in a church plant a few years ago, and that he is now pastoring that church.  So, after the initial pleasantries of, "How is the family?" and "Where are you living now?" etc., I asked, "How is that church thing going?"  He responded that, about six weeks ago, they had taken around 30 members of his 3 year old, 175 member, church and planted a new church a few miles away.  My response of, "Oh, really?  Our church has been talking about planting new churches in our area for a little while now," was met with a polite smile.  It was the smile I give people when I tell them that I develop mobile apps, and they respond with, "Oh yeah? I was going to try doing that, but I never really got started." 

I know our church has a vision for planting churches, and just because I'm not "in the loop" on the latest church-plant news doesn't mean things are stagnant.  But in the time that I have been hearing about our future planting plans, my friend has planted, grown, and planted again.  It's easy to say that I think planting a new church is a great idea, but have I volunteered to go help start that church? Nope.  Having noble intentions that cost me nothing is not the same as doing something noble, and costly.  In fact, like cancer awareness pink day, feeling good about our intentions can be detrimental to our action. 

If this sounds like I'm being harsh or pointing a finger at others, let me let you in on a secret.  I do this all the time.  I drop my 15 cents change into the charity bucket at Wawa, and feel like I did something.  Did I make someone a meal?  No.  Did I show compassion or love to someone.  No.  I might watch a YouTube video about some crisis on the other side of the world, then post it to Facebook for all my friends to see.  I feel pretty good about it, but it didn't cost me anything.  I talk, talk, talk about social justice, but rarely do anything about it. 

So what's the point?  I think we need to be aware that good intentions are not the final goal.  Let's call this "Good Intentions Awareness Month."  In our feel-good society, it's easy to get the feeling of making a difference without making any difference at all.  We are called to be the salt of the earth, but if that salt intends to season the food, but never actually makes it into the recipe, what good is it?  Let's let our actions speak louder than our words, even if our words sound pretty good.

Jeff Hyson

Toxic People

Who are they, anyway? 

My son-in-law has a saying which could describe the relationship we might have with someone who is not very good for us. He says, “When you put your gloved hand in the mud, the mud doesn’t get glovier!” And that is about what happens. If you have grown children I’m sure you can remember a new friend who seemed to be a bad influence on your child, or maybe it was just a bad combination of the two of them. Maybe new words suddenly appeared, or lying, or candy bars when he had no money! Upsetting, to say the least! And we think, “My goodness, is he/she so weak that just anyone can drag him around?!” 

But it’s not a matter of weakness, or, more realistically, it’s a weakness we all have, child and adult alike. The difference with a child is that he has no wisdom to recognize poor choices; choosing his new friends himself is all new and exciting to him. And his character is pretty much unformed.

With adults, it’s pretty much the same process, except that we ought to know better. We know when our actions change with different folks. We know when we adjust, not for the better, to fit in with some people. Yes, we know when we are not obeying the scripture which tells us that “whatever you do, do to the glory of God.” And we surely can be expected to listen to the Holy Spirit and to make better choices. We need wisdom and discernment; if we lack wisdom, God has promised to give it to us, if we just ask Him.  And we need that wisdom. Satan knows exactly where our weaknesses are, and that’s where he will tempt us. We don’t need to work up the strength ourselves to resist temptation. God’s strength is manifested in our weakness. He says so. Ask Him.

On the other hand, if you worked on the genogram a couple of weeks ago, you may have had to recognize and name a different kind of toxicity ----- the kind that has the power to damage us  and change us in situations we were never prepared to face. There may be ones who have the power to hurt us so badly that we have to separate ourselves from them for good. And with some of them, that solution is not completely possible.

My parents are both dead, so I can tell you a little about my story. My father had a very disruptive childhood. He was an orphan, and was adopted by a young Methodist pastor and his wife, who soon after both died in the flu epidemic in the early nineteen hundreds. There was some money, so for the rest of his childhood he was in court-supervised foster care, and who knows what happened to him there. We think he had no example of a good father as a child; certainly as an adult he was not a loving father. He gyrated from anger and suspicion to over-indulgence, and we never knew which it would be. He did not know how to love, except in one way: when I was grown and married and had two pre-teen daughters I discovered that he liked to kiss little girls. 

I have no idea when my mother discovered this charming pass-time --- surely much earlier ---  but she was very good at keeping her head in the sand like the proverbial ostrich when it was something she could not handle, so she was essentially a gifted enabler. I had never heard the word “pedophile,’ and I would be glad to tell any of you more about this terrible time in my life, but for now I will just say this: that that was when, to me, my father died. I will not go into the anger and betrayal and hatred I felt. It was impossible to cut him completely out of my life, but for the rest of his life I treated him with distant respect, essentially putting on an act for the rest of the world. When he actually died many years later I did not mourn; I had done my mourning, for more than his death, many years before.

Of course I do so sincerely hope that none of you ever have to experience anything like this, but I know that many of you have, though perhaps in a different way. And my very best advice to you is to get counseling! A good counselor has heard EVERYTHING, believe me, and would be so very much help in guiding you through it to a more healthy place in your life. You deserve it, and I am sure God wants you healthy, and both emotionally and spiritually mature.

Life is so messy. I know that God weeps with us when he sees the terrible things we do to each other, and I know that He longs to hold us and comfort us when we are so terribly hurt.  He does comfort us and gives us peace. And I know that there will be a day when all tears are wiped away, and all sin is gone forever. Come, Lord Jesus!

God bless you all.

Norma Stockton

In Dealing with Sin

(By Diego Cuartas)

I think it is important that we look at our personal sin in a way that we consider the Gospel and its benefits. Two initial thoughts come together in my mind about this:

1. If I don't look at my sin through the lenses of the gospel I will be tempted or prone to rely on a false gospel to deal with my sin. A false gospel can be a person, an experience, or a specific resource whether cognitive or material. The goal here is to come under the benefits of the Gospel rather than pursuing a strategy that could give me a sense of "righteousness" apart from Christ and what He has secured on my behalf (Ro 10:3-4, 2 Cor 5:21, Gal 2:21, Phil 3:9, Titus 3:5, 1 Pe 2:24, 2 Pe 1:1). One danger in dealing with our sin is to put ourselves again under the curse of the law (Gal 3:10) or the curse of trusting our own flesh (Jer 17). Either approach will place us under bondage.

2. It is important that I seek the grace of God for my life in my sin so that I don't look for grace substitutes else where (Gal 2:21, 1 Cor 1:4, Titus 2:11, 1 Pe 5:5). What we lose when we seek grace substitutes includes things like true repentance, personal growth, true humility, and the experience of what Jesus provides to us through specific grace.

When dealing with our sin, we should consider looking at few important things:

My reaction to my sin, my responsibility to others, and my response to God. These three groups are important because sin does not happen in a vacuum, sin happens in the context of God--as my reference point to any holiness and righteousness--others--as the ones impacted by my actions--and me--as the one where sin originated at.

Here are a few questions to process our own sin:

1. how am I dealing with my sin and it's impact in my own life?

2. what grace is God providing me? what promises can I lean on for the future?

3. what wisdom do I need in dealing with how my sin has impacted others?

4. where is obedience being hindered? how can I grow in repentance and faith?

5. how is my knowledge and love for God increasing? how is my identity being shaped by my experience of God and His revelation? what provisions can I count on in God?

My hope is that we can grow in dealing with our sin without missing the Gospel or the Grace God can only provide for each one of us. I am convinced that grace is not a generic reality--it is specific and it is more than capable to address the details and needs of our real time moments.

For further reflection: 2 Peter 1:3-4

" His divine power has given us everything we need for a godly life through our knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness. Through these he has given us his very great and precious promises, so that through them you may participate in the divine nature, having escaped the corruption in the world caused by evil desires."

Theology of Limits

Get a preview of where we are going next in the Everyday Gospel series.  http://www.emotionallyhealthy.org/the-gift-of-limits-and-leadership/