He Wanted His Sausage, Egg and Cheese Biscuit

He wanted his sausage, egg and cheese biscuit…and he wanted it NOW!

And not a Jimmy Dean one from the basement freezer. He wanted one from McDonald’s. The one in Malaga.

My poor father-in-law! It had been a long and confusing couple of days around here.

Let me tell you about it. I really do have a point. And it’s not a plug for McDonald’s.

Kenny’s parents, both in their early 90’s, have lived with us just short of two years. The months have flown by and I am stunned when I realize how long we have shared a home. It has been delightful. Honestly.

But a couple of weeks ago, Mom began to stay in bed a lot, very much out of character for this spunky, no nonsense farmer’s daughter.  I could tell she wasn’t feeling well at all. She also was barely eating and so she was very weak and shaky. Now she is just not a complainer and she doesn’t want to bother me, so it was pretty hard to get a lot of information. She also doesn’t like to go to the doctor and she knows how I feel about that. Bit by bit, though, her daughter and I pieced together enough information to be quite concerned. I’ll spare you the details!

And, sadly, this all began the week of their SEVENTIETH wedding anniversary! I told you she was spunky! And so is he.

We did some scrambling to accommodate our various party plans. The evening of July 25, seventy years after they had so innocently repeated their vows to stay together forever, Mom valiantly managed to sit, a bit wobbly, at my dining room table. She and Dad basked in the love and gratitude of several of their children, celebrating that very special, remarkable day. She ate very little. But she smiled a lot.

Dad enjoyed the evening. He loves having his children near. But he was clueless. A nasty stroke several years back left him with some frustrating memory issues and word retrieval problems. Mom said he had no idea it was their anniversary. He ate a lot and he smiled too. It was a joyous occasion whether he understood its purpose or not. They went to bed early, tired and happy.

But it took its toll.

Mom was terrible in the morning (Friday). She couldn’t even lift her head off the pillow without a lot of effort. I really thought we should go to the ER, but she adamantly refused. Her doctor would be back from his vacation on Monday morning, and she agreed she would go in to see him then. She let me call and make an appointment. The weekend loomed in front of us, though, and I was nervous about waiting that long. Something was very wrong with her. I know it sounds dramatic, but I am an experienced caregiver and have served quite a few ill and elderly ladies. I hoped she could last until Monday.

Slowly, with me supporting her, Mom quite literally staggered to her chair. We agreed she should try to drink something and attempt to eat some toast. Dad just hovered about like a frail and anxious helicopter. I fixed him some coffee and juice and got him his morning pills. Mom does everything for him, including driving him around in their pickup truck. That day, though, she couldn’t help him; she couldn’t really even do for herself. He was unhappy. The news was on and they wanted to watch it; that is their morning routine and they settled in. I went to get dressed.

When I returned, I thought Mom was a bit better. Relieved, I told them both that I had a 10 o’clock mentoring appointment in Vineland and another one at noon. I was conflicted, uncertain what to do. I hated to leave them. I told them I was happy to cancel if they wanted me to stay, but they assured me all was well. Mom just wanted to rest. And she was tired of us both fussing over her.

I reluctantly decided to go. I suggested I would bring Mom some chicken soup from Chick-fil-A when I came home in the afternoon and asked Dad what I could bring him. That’s when he told me he wanted me to go to Malaga. It took us a few minutes to figure out what he was trying to communicate. Finally it was clear. He wanted a sausage, egg, and cheese biscuit. From McDonald’s. From Malaga. Mom started to object, reminding him I was going somewhere else, but I assured her I would be happy to indulge him and get what he wanted on my way home. I did fuss around a bit more and then felt a little better about leaving. As I kissed them goodbye, I reminded Dad I would be bringing him the sandwich later on, thinking he would be pleased.

“Oh, no,” he said, clearly annoyed. “I want it now. Go to Malaga now.”

Well, it was nearly 9:30. Mission: Impossible. Not if I needed to be in Vineland by 10. I live in Pittsgrove.

And I had just gotten a new phone. My contacts were not downloaded correctly. I wasn’t sure I had the information necessary to cancel my first appointment in time. Mom and I tried to explain that I would be bringing the biscuit home for lunch or dinner, but Dad stubbornly repeated that he wanted it now. I sat down, conflicted, thinking what to do, when Mom pushed forward in her chair and said sweetly, “Well, I guess if you could help me out of this chair, I could pull on some clothes. I think I could get us to the Drive-Thru.”

Now, mind you, she was sicker than I have ever seen her—and I have been in the family for 49 years and a friend of the family’s for much longer than that. She had basically been in bed for over a week with few exceptions. She had quietly talked to her daughter and Kenny about some end of life matters. But this dear wife, not trying to manipulate me, not just sucking it up, not simply being a martyr, wanted to set her own personal and significant problems aside and sacrifice herself to please her man. Willingly. Readily. He wanted a biscuit. She would take him to get it.

No wonder they’ve lasted seventy years.

Sometimes I don’t feel like passing Kenny the salt.

Now I didn’t let her do it. I suddenly (Thank you, Jesus) remembered that Kenny’s brother, who was supposed to be taking them to Lobster House that day as his gift to them, was coming instead for a visit. I called him to see when he was coming and to ask him to make a detour to Malaga. He was happy to oblige. Dad got his biscuit. I kept my appointment. And Mom, after a lot of poking, prodding, and testing this week, finally has a diagnosis or two and is making a slow but steady recovery. She really was (and is) very sick. And she still doesn’t like to go to the doctor.

So here’s my point...well, one of them. My in-laws, by their own admission, are not perfect people. Nor was their marriage ever a perfect marriage. But when they vowed to see it through, to stick it out for better or worse, in sickness or in health, ‘til death would part them (maybe sooner now than later), they meant it. Their lives haven’t always been easy. There have been some very ugly and difficult days. There has been fun, laughter, and music. There has been sadness, pain and confusion. But I have witnessed them pull together and cry out to their God…in joy and in sorrow. They know He is the One who has been with them from the beginning of their long journey. He is the faithful One. Hadn’t they each pledged, “…so help me God?” He did.  

 I was humbled that busy morning. I felt I had just witnessed something beautiful and sacred. Yes, I was convicted of my own selfishness and laziness.  Yes, I was embarrassed that I don’t always want to love and serve Kenny like that. No, I don’t want to be uncaring and egocentric. Yes, I want to have a good marriage. There is much to be learned from watching their tender care of each other, and I want to be a good student.

But there was so much more. And this is my most important point. You see, I don’t think that touching scene from the lengthy story of their marriage was really about Mom and Dad at all.

I think it was a God moment just for me.

In the unselfish, unconditional, sacrificial love Mom displayed to a rather cranky, insensitive man whose mind betrays him, I saw my Father’s perfect love for me, one, oh, so undeserving: weak, ungrateful, forgetful, selfish, broken, demanding and miserable. Yet He unconditionally, selflessly and lavishly pours out His love to me over and over. It is simply unfathomable.

And it has and will last much, much longer than 70 years.

Doesn’t He do that for you, too?

Yes, He does. Look no further than the cross.

It’s His love that compels us to love.

A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. All men will know that you are my disciples if you love one another.                                John 13:34-35

Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love.                       1 John 4:7-8

Consider the words from the beautiful hymn, How Deep the Father’s Love for Us.

How deep the Father's love for us

How vast beyond all measure

That He should give His only Son

To make a wretch His treasure

—Eileen Hill

Who Keeps Moving My stuff? Oooooooh...Me

A few weeks ago at work, I was listening to some messages on Youtube, and I just let it go to the next one…the next one…then I found myself listening to a Biblical teacher, Dr John Barnett, and he explained something that got my attention. He said, “I used to teach a youth group, and something that I noticed is most people think of idols as just something that we love more than Jesus. But imagine we have a shelf of a couple of levels, and you put things on it in your life that matter to you. First of all, Jesus goes right up on the top shelf. People would say, ‘See, look, I have Jesus up there and I’m quite excited about that.’ Then they put things on other shelves that are important, but life happens and then there are lots of things and some are just making their way up there with Him on the top shelf. Not intentionally to compete with Him, but because they are life. They are important to us. Car, girlfriend, bank account, phone, electronics!! It’s not that they are more important than Jesus, it’s that they become just as important.”

In life, it’s so incredibly easy to get caught up in doing things, important things, sometimes even ministry things, and missing out on the relationship we have in Christ. In such small movements, and maybe even unnoticeable priority shifts, things on our lower shelves get shifted up higher and higher until Jesus is in a crowded area with a lot of our stuff. I can assure you that it’s tough to reflect Christ in our lives when there’s so much sharing the same place as Jesus in our lives. “Who put that up there?!! Oh… me.”

Here’s an interesting way to look at the shelf explanation. I wonder what Jesus’ shelf looked like during His ministry. I’m sure God the Father was on the top shelf and second shelf were people. Us! In Matthew 26:39 “He went a little farther and fell on His face, and prayed, saying, “O My Father, if it is possible, let this cup pass from Me; nevertheless, not as I will, but as You will.”  Jesus’ highest priority was the Will of His Father and not his own. I would think that this should be our highest importance in our lives. “Jesus, Your will, not mine.”

I have noticed in my journey from where I was in life, as I walk in a relationship with Jesus, that all the things I could move from one shelf to another shelf are moving down as I listen to and follow Jesus. In other words, things in my life are not as important as I thought they were. God has been working on me in areas of priorities in finances, possessions, relationships…family. They are not drifting away; it’s just that I’m not trying to make Jesus share the importance of things. He’s at the top as our Savior should be. And maybe I need to clear my top shelf of my stuff for Him and only Him.

Jesus must increase, but I must decrease. (I think I’ve heard that before!)

—Brian Rainey

Sound Your Trumpet!

Playing an instrument in a band can be wonderful, exhilarating, intimidating and stretching.  Every musician has their own part in order to support their instrumental section. The woodwind section consisting of the flutes and reed instruments plays a large part in a  band. The percussion section, of course, are usually the loudest instruments heard, due to the fact that they are largely responsible to keep the beat or the tempo of the song. And finally, there is the brass section, in which I played the baritone horn in high school. It was quite the adventure getting into that band! I had played the piano since the age of four, but I had never seen them actually wheel a piano around on a flatbed during the high school football halftime show! So therefore I needed to learn another instrument that I could play in the high school band. I consulted my very talented cousin Carol. She played everything! She taught me to play the baritone horn, which in fact has the same fingering as the trumpet, so I learned two instruments while only learning one!! I loved it! Due to Carol’s gift for teaching, I was able to go ahead and make first chair baritone! Whoo Hoo!! 

I was recently thinking about the trumpet, and it reminded me of the incredible book in the Bible called Nehemiah. It’s about a Jewish man named Nehemiah who was called by God to rebuild the wall of Jerusalem. Nehemiah gathered workers together in order to accomplish the task at hand. Whoever felt that God Himself was leading them to help in the massive project joined him. In groups, they all focused on specific areas of the wall, so they were very spread out. The wall was huge, so the distance between the workers created a vulnerability. The officials of the territory were not in favor of God’s people accomplishing the project, so they would frequently interfere with any type of distraction possible. Other times there would be other trouble that would ensue. Here is what the passage from Nehemiah says:

13-14 So I stationed armed guards at the most vulnerable places of the wall and assigned people by families with their swords, lances, and bows. After looking things over I stood up and spoke to the nobles, officials, and everyone else: “Don’t be afraid of them. Put your minds on the Master, great and awesome, and then fight for your brothers, your sons, your daughters, your wives, and your homes.”

15-18 Our enemies learned that we knew all about their plan and that God had frustrated it. And we went back to the wall and went to work. From then on half of my young men worked while the other half stood guard with lances, shields, bows, and mail armor. Military officers served as backup for everyone in Judah who was at work rebuilding the wall. The common laborers held a tool in one hand and a spear in the other. Each of the builders had a sword strapped to his side as he worked. I kept the trumpeter at my side to sound the alert.

19-20 Then I spoke to the nobles and officials and everyone else: “There’s a lot of work going on and we are spread out all along the wall, separated from each other. When you hear the trumpet call, join us there; our God will fight for us.”

This passage points  to something that I highly value: we need each other in order to accomplish the purposes to which God has called us. What has become a normal part of my life is this. I have put together, what I call, a Prayer Team. I find when I go through everyday life, I frequently come upon situations that cause me to feel very vulnerable. Whether it be a medical situation surrounding labs, a procedure or new condition.  Or, it may be a family crisis where I am desperate for God’s deliverance. I BLOW MY TRUMPET!!!!!! Just like they did on the wall of Jerusalem. My “trumpet” is an email, informing my team of the details of what is going on, what I need them to pray for and thanking them for supporting me. I know that God hears the prayers of the saints. The Bible says :

James 5:16 

Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective.

My challenge for you is this. Do you have a Prayer Team of people that you KNOW will be consistently praying for you? Are you willing to SOUND YOUR TRUMPET and ask for help, or are you trying to live in a form of isolation and not bother anyone with your problems? I would encourage you to look at the book of Nehemiah and decide for yourself. Maybe it’s time for you to form a prayer team and learn to play the “trumpet” too! 

Blessings Friends,

Lois Robinson

How Big?

My sweet almost-5 Carter found two dead bugs on a window- sill. He brought them to me.

“Look, Mom-Mom! Look at their little legs! Aren’t they cute? Awwwww … They’re so cute, Mom-Mom!”

I’m not too fond of bugs, dead or alive, but he loved them, and wanted to keep them, so I of course allowed him to keep them on my window- sill. He was happy.

“They’re all dead! Will they go to heaven?” I sincerely hoped not, but I allowed as how they were made by God and God would decide. That satisfied him, and he came back several times to see them.

But I was left thinking about the fact that God had indeed made them, and had given them life as only He is able to do. Their tiny legs (so cute to Carter), and their beautifully designed under-wings, and their unique digestive system, and their tiny, tiny eyes  ----  all this for a lifespan of just a few days, to end up a treasure on a little boy’s window- sill.

And then I thought about the eggs they developed from, and how all of God’s creatures grew from eggs. And I was again overwhelmed by the Mind that designed the eggs and wrote within them all of the instructions on how to grow and what to be. I thought about our DNA and our brains and how there are parts of our bodies, and our brains, which we still don’t understand.

I have long loved thinking about what fun it must have been for Jesus to pick colors for all the birds, and for all the flowers, and animals, and everything else on this glorious earth He made for us to enjoy.

And I thought about that question, “How big is your God?”

Our God, who spoke into being all the intricacies of our human bodies, and the three stomachs a cow needs, and the way our earth moves around the sun; how can we belittle Him?

How can we ever doubt him, or think we can ever have a problem too big for Him to handle? Here we are, mere created creatures who because of His love for us have been given the fantastic privilege of being able to talk, actually TALK, to the Being who designed and created not only us but so much more than we can even begin to understand!

O Christians, trust Him! He is so completely, totally able! I know that sometimes the answers don’t come when we think they should, and may not be the answers we wanted, but God is there, seeing everything, forgiving everything and loving you more than you have ever been loved.

HOW BIG IS YOUR GOD?

—Norma Stockton

A Story of Jesus in the Midst of Lingering, Deep-Seated Disorder

Later on there was a Jewish festival (feast) for which Jesus went up to Jerusalem.

Now there is in Jerusalem a pool near the Sheep Gate. This pool in the Hebrew is called Bethesda, having five porches (alcoves, colonnades, doorways).

In these lay a great number of sick folk—some blind, some crippled, and some paralyzed (shriveled up)—waiting for the bubbling up of the water.

For an angel of the Lord went down at appointed seasons into the pool and moved and stirred up the water; whoever then first, after the stirring up of the water, stepped in was cured of whatever disease with which he was afflicted.

There was a certain man there who had suffered with a deep-seated and lingering disorder for thirty-eight years.

When Jesus noticed him lying there [helpless], knowing that he had already been a long time in that condition, He said to him, Do you want to become well? [Are you really in earnest about getting well?]

The invalid answered, Sir, I have nobody when the water is moving to put me into the pool; but while I am trying to come [into it] myself, somebody else steps down ahead of me.

Jesus said to him, Get up! Pick up your bed (sleeping pad) and walk!

Instantly the man became well and recovered his strength and picked up his bed and walked. But that happened on the Sabbath.

So the Jews kept saying to the man who had been healed, It is the Sabbath, and you have no right to pick up your bed [it is not lawful].

He answered them, The Man Who healed me and gave me back my strength, He Himself said to me, Pick up your bed and walk!

John 5

This story about Jesus and a man with a ‘lingering’ disorder keeps knocking around in my brain these days. I’m not quite sure why. But here are a couple of thoughts that have stood out to me…and maybe they’ll start knocking around in your mind, too.

This guy had something that had plagued him his whole life.

The translation I’m using describes it as ‘lingering’ and ‘deep-seated.’

It also says that others around him were ‘blind,’ ‘crippled,’ ‘paralyzed,’ and ‘shriveled up.’

They were all waiting for a system for how to get well…and it was a limited system. There was space for only a few, and there was not space for this man. The system limited him for getting well, getting free, getting healed of his deep-seated disorder. It wasn’t powerful enough to help with the depth of what he was carrying. And the system wasn’t strong enough to deal with the scope of debilitating needs all around.

He couldn’t get set free by the system or by the pattern of what everyone else was doing.

But it strikes me very deeply the way that he DID get set free, that he got healed: he came face-to-face with the person of Jesus. Jesus didn’t do any fancy system or pattern of special things. He Himself just made this guy well. It was Jesus. It was being in His presence. It was an encounter with Jesus. It was the merciful, powerful, full-of-ability-and-capacity-choice of Jesus, a real person.

I don’t have much to say besides that story keeps coming to my mind.

Are there ways you tend to turn to a system to heal you, to save you, to make you well? Are there ways you’re ’waiting in line’ for your healing and there’s not really space for you in the system? I know for me I tend towards looking to a system for what I need because it’s more controllable, I can understand it and explain it more easily. If you look further in the passage, this healed man received a lot of grief about his healing because he couldn’t explain it in the current rules of what was acceptable.

I’d like to encourage you to look to Person of Jesus, look to His very real Presence for the very real needs that you carry today. For the things that you’ve carried for a long time, the things that are deep-seated and lingering, what if Jesus is right in the midst of all the people, asking you if you really want to get well? Your reality probably is that you are most likely surrounded by people who genuinely are crippled, who are blind, who are paralyzed, and shriveled up on the inside, and they, as well, need you to blaze a trail away from waiting for the ‘pool to get stirred,’ and to turn to the Person of Jesus…and to show them the way, too.

My guess is that He fully sees you, in all that you have experienced and all that you are experiencing, and His eyes are full of mercy and capacity to heal.

—Sarah Howard

Are Your Words Improving Your Friendships?

Relationships require work and lots of grace. This week I want to share a blog authored by Paul Tripp. In his blog, Paul offers to us wise suggestions to improve our friendships with others. Friendships can be sometimes frustrating and other times they can be life-giving. So this week, let us consider how to improve the gift of friendships we may have in our lives. Click here to wisely improve your friendships.

—Diego Cuartas

High-Sounding Nonsense

I remember one summer taking a biology class at a local university. I had called my husband (who was my fiancé at the time) crying, and I mean “ugly crying,” because I was so affected by one of my classes. My professor, who was an atheist, was presenting what she believed was scientific evidence that there could not be a God, and why the notion of a created earth was absurd. I said to him, “Dave, you should have heard her...it was so cunning, she appeared so convincing. If I didn’t know the truth for myself, I would feel ridiculous for believing what I do.” My heart broke for the other students, for my professor, and for the hundreds of thousands that would hear similar lectures.” I have been having a similar experience over the last few years related to notions of mental and emotional health. Man! There are some VERY CONVINCING philosophies out there. There are also some VERY CONVINCING half-truths and watered-down versions of these philosophies floating around in every environment including the Christian church. My heart breaks. At times I feel a little helpless seeing how many around me accept these messages as forms of increased health, insight, and enlightenment. They SOUND truthful, they SOUND good...but they are laden with the promotion and glorification of self, and the consequent de-throning of the absolute authority of God over our lives. “YOU are the author of your life,” “Follow YOUR dreams,” “YOU are enough,” self love, self direction, self, self, self… honestly, sometimes it makes me want to scream. You see, not that long ago, I believed these lies. I was so blinded, I led groups of struggling women to these very lies with the promise that they would be healed of emotional distress if they loved themselves more. It’s a slippery slope for sure. It sounds beautiful, it sounds so positive...it is leading us to destruction. There IS such a thing as truth...and this is NOT it. This, my friends, is simply “high-sounding nonsense.” I am personally SO grateful for God’s salvation and consequent sanctification. Paul’s letters are some of my favorite scriptures to read. Paul speaks with conviction as one who had previously “bought into” the laws and false philosophies of the Jewish culture. One who KNOWS how convincing these deceitful philosophies are because he was once the one doing the convincing in his opposition of Jesus Christ and the church. Here are a few passages that help me on my journey to abandoning the deceitful philosophies I’ve bought into:

“And now, just as you accepted Christ Jesus as your Lord, you must continue to follow him. Let your roots grow down into him, and let your lives be built on him. Then your faith will grow strong in the truth you were taught, and you will overflow with thankfulness. Don’t let anyone capture you with empty philosophies and high-sounding nonsense that come from human thinking and from the spiritual powers of this world, rather than from Christ.” Colossians 2:6-8 NLT

“You should know this, Timothy, that in the last days there will be very difficult times. For people will love only themselves and their money. They will be boastful and proud, scoffing at God, disobedient to their parents, and ungrateful. They will consider nothing sacred. They will be unloving and unforgiving; they will slander others and have no self-control. They will be cruel and hate what is good. They will betray their friends, be reckless, be puffed up with pride, and love pleasure rather than God. They will act religious, but they will reject the power that could make them godly. Stay away from people like that! They are the kind who work their way into people’s homes and win the confidence of vulnerable women who are burdened with the guilt of sin and controlled by various desires. (Such women are forever following new teachings, but they are never able to understand the truth.)” 2 Timothy 3:1-7 NLT

I know for me the reasons that I bought into these messages is that I was starved for someone to tell me that I was worthwhile, and that I was loved, and accepted. I falsely believed that I had to take control and ownership of that loving and accepting of myself because who else would? The thing I’m most grateful for in my ongoing sanctification process is that I am increasingly getting to know a God who loves and accepts me and sees me as more worthwhile than I could EVER see myself. When we abandon the love of ourselves, we gain more than we could ever imagine...experiencing the love of a Savior.

—Lindsay Thompson

Tomorrow's Freshmen

It was a big, crowded auditorium at Duke University. The line was long and restless as we waited to march single-file through the metal detectors, past the watchful security team. We were warned we couldn’t bring even a purse inside with us.

Now that presented a problem.

But I am ever resourceful. I tucked my tissues in the sleeve of my dress, smiling to myself as I did it. I was becoming my grandmother! She always seemed to have something stuffed somewhere on her person. And she was a pro at that Kleenex thing.

“Are you planning on crying?” my sweet, ten-year-old granddaughter, Kate, asked as she curiously watched me slipping the tissues in. I explained to her that I needed them for my allergies, but, honestly, we both know me better than that. Before the first familiar strains of Pomp and Circumstance had floated up to the vaulted ceiling, I was blubbering all over the place.

The same thing had happened a couple of weeks earlier here in NJ.  

I have had two lovely granddaughters, Isabella and Ana, grandchildren #5 and #6 respectively, graduate from High School this spring. One is a homeschooler, one a public school student. One is from the north, one is from the south. One is a ballerina, one a pole vaulter. Both are the first-born daughters of my two sons. Both are leaving home for the very first time, scholarships in hand, to attend colleges at the end of the summer.

So I blubber.

For some reason, the idea of these two being on their own, away from their nurturing and protective families, has deeply affected me. In my heart, I know it is time. They are not foolish girls. I know they are wise…and I know they know and trust their heavenly Father Who will be with them wherever they are. I know that too. I think I just don’t like change, and this is the first step in their growing away from us.

But I think it’s even more than that.

I keep thinking about the world they are so innocently and expectantly entering. There are so very many things they don’t know that they don’t know. I keep wishing I could somehow prepare them, warn them, or protect them. I wish I had the right words...

Then yesterday, quite by accident, I stumbled on this article on John Piper’s Desiring God website. It was authored by Matt Reagan, a campus outreach director. He is a youth guy and he is a bit over the top…that comes with the territory. And I suppose his ideas could be considered radical or even harsh, but I think his viewpoint is worth the read. It resonated deeply with me.

I pulled a few more hankies out of my sleeve.

It’s what I want my girls to think about. It’s what I want ALL of us to think about— whether we are wide-eyed graduates or sappy old grandmothers. There’s much to consider. Read on.

Class of 2019, to graduate from high school is an achievement requiring a significant mixture of effort and circumstances, and millions have not experienced that. You have both worked and been given a gift. Let one of the themes of your upcoming summer be gratitude to God.

In the same breath, I would advise you to make another focus of this summer to prepare yourself for the transformative season of life to come.

As a veteran college minister, I watch students like you roll onto campus each fall, and I am reminded that the educational system you are leaving has shaped your view of the world.

You have given yourself to the establishment of a reputation in academics, athletics, and extra-curriculars, all while building a sparkling résumé. Your parents, teachers, and friends likely have played their part in upholding that pattern of life. Your identity in that world inevitably runs deep.

It’s time to die to that reputation. All of it.

The apostle Paul was an unbelievable student. He was born into a tradition of high-achieving scholars, and he took the opportunity to dominate the classroom, leaving his classmates in his wake (Galatians 1:14). But when God intervened, Paul died a beautiful death. He died to every boast he had previously carried — every line of his résumé. He was presented in Christ with a superior righteousness, one offered outside of himself, and he took it gladly (Philippians 3:4–9). I beg you to do the same.

And I beg you to mean it. I can only assume most people are like me in this, but I am a sly smuggler of alternative identities. I give lip service to “all I have is Christ,” but my anxious thoughts after interacting with people betray the smuggle struggle. I want them to know my résumé. I’m not convinced in those moments that I am perfect in the eyes of my heavenly Father and adopted into his family. The real death to reputation hurts like crazy (all deaths do), but the result is freedom like you’ve never known. 

As you die to what has defined you and find your life in Christ, here are six other pieces of counsel I regularly give to any freshman heading to college.

1. Arrogance is not a sign of maturity.

Ministering at the college campus, I am regularly struck by two contradictory truths about rising freshmen. On the one hand, they are starting arguably the most formative season of their lives, at least as far as spiritual development is concerned. On the other hand, they are regularly convinced that their convictions are fully formed.

So, I have some advice for you, high-school graduate: learn to learn. To be led. Remind yourself that you’re eighteen. Try not to believe every voice that has seen you attend youth group or read your Bible through high school, the voice that says you’re ready to pastor your home church. I would contend that, almost without exception, every college freshman believer is a toddler in the faith, whether they prayed a prayer at four years old or accepted Christ on a Young Life retreat after their senior summer.

Arrival is not a reality for the Christian anyway. If you can learn the depth of your sin and need, Jesus will become a greater treasure than your own maturity, and you will become humble, teachable, and relatable.

2. Beware the allure of the 4.0.

(I know, moms and dads everywhere are cringing.) “Be excellent in your studies” may have been your comprehensive framework for a Christian student’s life in high school, but there is a raging perfectionist in some of you that needs to die. That 4.0 will whisper to some of you constantly, but often at the cost of your peace, your sleep, and your relationships with God and others.

Unless you have some massive kingdom vision that requires perfect grades (cue rampant rationalizing), they really aren’t that big a deal. The point of college is to teach you what you need to know so that you might contribute to society (and in the case of every believer, to bring the gospel to whatever area of society that is). So, go to class, learn the material, wonder at God as he reveals himself in every subject, and calm your hyper-focus on grades.

3. Make future wealth less of a priority.

As God led me through my own experience in college, I realized that I needed two big deaths. The first was to the aforementioned reputation, but the second was to financial security as a primary factor in my vocational decision-making.

God showed me that if I was going to step toward him in my major, and eventually, my career, I wasn’t going to do so because I loved money. No one can serve two masters. He tells us clearly, “Keep yourself free from the love of money, and be content with what you have, for [I] have said, ‘I will never leave you nor forsake you’” (Hebrews 13:5).

4. Make your future decisions as a missionary.

I meet so many freshmen who have already established a ten-year plan. They’re quick to mention their pre-med or pre-law major during orientation week. They typically don’t understand their own gifting or desires yet, though, much less their overarching kingdom purpose.

Prestige and money are powerful motivators, but the joy of showing the living Christ to those who desperately need him whips them cold. Ask God and your fellow believers to show you how you might best be used to help people taste and see the goodness of the gospel. I’m thinking here of a swath of vocations, sacred and secular alike, but all in the spirit of Philippians 1:21–22:

To me to live is Christ, and to die is gain. If I am to live in the flesh, that means fruitful labor for me.

Figure out how to get equipped for that vocation, and get cracking.

5. Make your present decisions as a missionary.

The people who need Jesus aren’t only waiting for you in the far reaches of the world or out in the secular workforce. They are your roommates, classmates, and teammates. They lie in bed worrying about their reputations. They question the goodness of God because of their experiences with “Christians” or loss of loved ones. They grasp and claw for life. Don’t be so consumed by your personal pursuits toward the future, academic and otherwise, that you forget to look up and notice the gospel opportunities on campus.

6. Enjoy freedom from the pattern of the world.

From time to time, I briefly entertain the thought of walking away from Christ into a full embrace of sin and self. I let myself run down that road for a moment, considering all its ramifications. I perform this counterintuitive exercise to cement what my time on the college campus has clearly demonstrated: following Christ is sanity. A “normal college life,” beholden to the approval of others, laden with anxious perfectionism, and insatiably pursuing worldly satisfaction, is insanity. There is no clarity like biblical clarity, no security like gospel security, no friendship like Christian friendship, no freedom like that of the saved sinner.

So, you have much to look forward to in the days ahead. May it be more Christ-filled than anything you’ve experienced yet, and may many know his glory through you.

So, here’s to your college years, my sweet girls. May you grow in the grace and knowledge of the Lord Jesus Christ. May you find in Him everything you need as you secure your unique place in the Kingdom. May He bless you with His peace and His Presence all the days of your lives. I love you so very much.

I hope you, dear reader, find the joy and satisfaction of a life lived for Him too. May God bless your personal pursuit.

Now it’s time for more tissues…

—Eileen Hill

He Must Increase, But I Must Decrease

John 3:30  He must increase, but I must decrease.

A very good friend of mine and I have lunch occasionally. We usually get into some great discussions about life and all the things that seem to be beating us up. We always share things about our involvement at our churches, the people that are affecting our lives, the spiritual battles. There was this one discussion where my friend and I were discussing something, and he said this phrase that has rocked my world: “I never want to stand in the way of the Glory of God; In all that I do, I always want to point people to Christ.” Wow. This immediately caught my attention, and I started thinking about what that really means. Am I ever guilty of this? Both of us are musicians on worship teams, and the conversation was about being in front of a church and bringing glory to ourselves, playing things up or basically showing off. We both know that if we don’t actively “point to Christ” or “use our talents for Him in worship” when we are in front of a church, people would see us mixed into the worship and lose sight of Jesus. Oh, that’s just not good at all. 

So, off on a journey through the Bible to challenge this statement. There are a lot of references of those pointing attention to self in the Bible. And quite a few who humbly pointed attention to Christ. But one day after digging through passages and not doing too well with an answer, I spoke to Pastor Chris before a practice and he says, “The opposite of that sounds like John the Baptist.” Yikes, this was a “slap my forehead moment.” I had been looking for the example of someone standing in the way of God’s work or even taking credit for what God has done. I should have been looking for the exact opposite.

In the early part of John, while at a place where people were being baptized, John the Baptist was asked by the Jews (John 3:25-30), “Then there arose a dispute between some of John’s disciples and the Jews about purification. Rabbi, He who was with you beyond the Jordan, to whom you have testified—behold, He is baptizing, and all are coming to Him!” John answered and said, “A man can receive nothing unless it has been given to him from heaven. You yourselves bear me witness, that I said, ‘I am not the Christ,’ but, ‘I have been sent before Him.’ He who has the bride is the bridegroom; but the friend of the bridegroom, who stands and hears him, rejoices greatly because of the bridegroom’s voice. Therefore this joy of mine is fulfilled. He must increase, but I must decrease.”

The original statement does hit the mark, just not in the exact way John the Baptist said it. The idea of “not me, but Christ” is within it.

How else could this be applied? Do we reflect Christ in all that we do? And all the time, not just on Sunday? Do people around us see Christ in our conversations or do they see us? When we are angry, do they see Christ working in us or do they see us? When something has obviously changed in our lives by God, do we give Him credit for what He has done or just keep it quiet?

Jesus must increase, I must decrease.

Have a great day!

—Brian Rainey

Song Singing vs Worship Leading

Years ago, I attended a Methodist Church for many years. I had gotten connected there in an interesting way back in my twenties. My friend’s mom was getting married. She asked if I would play the organ for her wedding at the church, a small country church with a big organ. I didn’t know how to play an organ at the time. Piano yes, keyboard yes, but not a pipe organ. It was the kind with all of the foot pedals, stops, etc.

I said, “Sure, I will!!” What was I thinking? All I knew was I better start practicing. So I called to see if someone would let me into the church so I could “practice,” meaning, LEARN HOW TO PLAY AN ORGAN! Someone kindly let me in on a Saturday morning. As I was sitting on the big organ bench, finally getting up the nerve to touch the keys, the pedals, fiddle with the stops that made all different sounds with the tones, I began to play the Bridal March. Soon, the church secretary looked in the backdoor near me and said “Oh, we need an organist! Do you want the job?” Well, she was talking to a struggling twenty-five year old that needed money and could play one song on the organ, so I said “SURE!” The rest was history. I learned how to play the organ and became the praise team leader. But, I am convinced I was just a song singing leader. I didn’t know the first thing about worship leading. There is a big difference.

Our Pastor then retired and a new guy was hired. He was so different. He looked like a surfer dude. Long hair, younger. And he slowly challenged the norm at our church. I noticed that he put his hands up in the air when he sang. This made no sense to me. I was the paid music director and youth director, so he and I worked closely together. I remember he would question what music I was listening to. It definitely wasn’t worship music. He would ask, “Lo, when you listen to your music, does it lead your mind closer to Jesus or farther away?” What a great question. Usually my answer was, “Jamie, my music if fine!” But, eventually I was willing to admit that it wasn’t fine. The music I filled my head with didn’t move me closer to Jesus. It would put my brain and heart in a place it didn’t belong, sometimes leading me into temptation. Slowly but surely, I eliminated that kind of music from my life. I also remember a retreat he took the leaders on up at Harvey Cedars. He passed out a survey, and one of the questions was about how we follow Jesus. One answer was I AM A RADICAL follower of Jesus. I thought that was crazy, so I didn’t check it. I didn’t understand what that really meant. I had no clue what I was missing either. I didn’t know what I didn’t know. That was also true of the “hands raised up thing during songs at church” as well. I didn’t think it took all of that. I thought it was kind of weird. I just didn’t know what I needed to know. So I finally asked him, and this is what he taught me. He said the reason he raised his hands was because he was communicating with Jesus. People raise their hands for many different reasons in church.

I am now someone who rarely keeps my hands down and here is why. I learned that when I used to go to a church service, I did not really expect anything from God. I was going because I grew up being trained in that is what we do on Sunday morning.

I expected the doors to be open; I expected to sing some songs; I expected the song leader to lead us.

I expected the Pastor to talk and talk.

I expected to sing one last song; I expected to have to put some money is some basket; I expected to then leave. Church was done and now we get on with our day and have fun. It was like a weekly appointment. I was good for doing it. That was my experience of church. There was no Jesus in that, only me religiously doing something.

My understanding has totally changed, Thank God! I also have to thank Pastor Jamie Bagley for allowing God to use him to speak into my life. It was huge! He was my first mentor in worship training.

Now, I don’t consider it church anymore, but a worship service.

I expect God to meet me there in corporate worship. When the worship leader tells me to stand, I MOVE from the back of the seat to the front. I cannot stand well so I sit, but no matter. I MOVE. I follow their leadership.

I expect music to play, and I will worship Jesus. It is a conscious choice to direct all of my attention to Jesus, not even the screens up front with the words. They are only there for those who don’t know the words. If you know the words, you shouldn’t have to look at the screen. Direct all of your attention onto Him. Close your eyes if you want. I raise my hands to communicate with Jesus. When my hands are straight up in the air, it’s my way of declaring victory with my Jesus. If my hands are out with palms up, it’s usually because I’m surrendering or I am once again in a desperate place and need Him to fill me up again and again. My body language communicates with my God throughout the worship service and throughout the week. I focus on how beyond grateful I am for ALL HE HAS DONE for me. The words of the songs resonate with me because they remind me again and again WHO HE IS, HOW GREAT HE IS, HOW MIGHTY HE IS, HOW HOLY HE IS.

AND I WANT TO GIVE HIM THE PRAISE AND WORSHIP HE DESERVES!!

As I see it, the only other options would be for us to not engage with singing or just sing the song because we like it. Singing a song doesn’t involve much. The focus is usually on us. We like it so we tend to really get into it, and we shout out our enthusiasm for the band or the people singing it with us. We sing the words and then we are done, without much engagement.

I expect the Pastor to preach a message that God has anointed. I ask the Holy Spirit to speak to me and to help me understand what He, God, is saying to me through the Pastor.

I expect to give God 10% of my weekly paycheck. This is not because I am just supposed to give MY money to the church but because God owns it all, including the money HE has allowed me to earn. God commands me to be a good manager of everything He has given me to manage, including finances. Me tithing is me communicating to God that I love Him, I will obey Him and I will give freely and joyfully to advance His Kingdom.

I expect to sing one last song some weeks. I move forward if God directs me to, and I always pray that the Holy Spirit will move the people forward that He is calling forward.

Song Singing vs. Worship Leading…you, my friend, are your own worship leader. If you choose, command your soul to worship...even when you don’t feel like it!

Amen

—Lois Robinson

Grace

My birthday (88th!) fell last weekend, and we had our two little boys for an overnight (my great-grandsons). They are four and six, so of course the conversation evolved to how unbelievably OLD I am, and from there to dying, and how does that happen, and when, and what happens next … most of this from the four-year-old. I managed to explain that when I die I will go to heaven and be with Jesus, and no, I wouldn’t come back, and that EVERYONE who loves Jesus goes to heaven. He wanted to know if he would go there too, and we assured him that if he loved Jesus he certainly would, and he would see us again and get big hugs! And then he asked, “But how will I know how to find you?”

His Grammy Joyce and I made it very clear that God would tell us he was coming, and we would be right there to meet him!

Little ones are so dear. They have so many questions, and they need answers that will satisfy them and reassure them that their world is good, and safe, no matter what problems they live with. Especially they need to know that Jesus loves them wholeheartedly. I didn’t give this to my children.

When I was a young mother, I didn’t believe in child evangelism. I thought that it was unfair to warp their young minds. I cannot erase from my mind the night that my eldest asked me, as I kissed her goodnight, to tell her if Jesus was God. And I answered, “That’s something you’ll have to decide when you’re older.” And she said, “But I want you to TELL me!” And I said no.

I thought I was so right. I thought I was so wise. I was so proud of myself for handling her question in just the right way. And as years passed, and all of us, me, my husband and three younger children all came to Christ’s saving grace, the nights were many when I wept bitter tears over this searing memory, and prayed that this beloved daughter would, too, come to belief in Christ as her Savior.

God was so fantastically good. He never forgot this dear child and had long since forgiven her wayward mother. He wrapped her in his loving arms, and one night her brother brought her to Jesus. And all my prayers were answered. I didn’t deserve such grace, but then, none us us ever ‘deserve’ God’s grace, His undeserved favor. But He loves us, beyond our understanding.

So, you can surely well imagine the absolute joy I feel now when I see young parents leading their children into the sure knowledge of God’s love for them, and explaining Communion, and telling them about their Savior.

I thank God every hour for His love, and for His kindness, and for the way He created a plan for us to share His presence forever. I thank Him for loving me, and for understanding me, and for leading me into truth.

And yes, little four-year-old … I will be waiting for you when God calls you home, years and years and years from now.

—Norma Stockton

Motherhood

In honor of Mother’s Day just having passed, I’d like to share with you all one of my favorite blogs on mothering. It’s one of my favorites because it is a reminder I need over and over and over again: that I am in a perfect place, a significant place, to learn more about and to practice living out what Jesus did for me, as a mom. My life isn’t too busy, too mundane, too complex, too commonplace, too annoying. It’s the perfect place set out for ME to delve into the Gospel TODAY. I need that reminder almost daily. 

—Sarah Howard

Just Read Your Bible!

It’s funny how some things get seared into your mind, and yet other things are so hard to recall. I remember being at a camp with my youth group one summer. I can’t even recall what we were doing at the time, but I remember watching a boy who had recently begun to follow Jesus reading his Bible. Kids were playing all around him, there was loud conversation happening, and here he was completely immersed in reading his Bible. If I didn’t know what book he was holding in his hands, I would have thought for sure it was some new young adult bestseller by the way he was glued to the pages. I remember NOTHING else about that week of summer camp except thinking, “Man, I want to read my Bible the way Mark is reading his.”

The truth is, I often feel intimidated at the idea of reading my Bible. It feels like a BIG undertaking and one that I need to be on my “A-game” mentally to approach. Over the years, I have tried to analyze why this is, or where this thought came from. I think about my Christian schooling background and wonder if maybe I’ve come to think of the Bible as a textbook that is too difficult for me to decipher outside of a classroom or sermons. I also think about my tendency for all-or-nothing thinking and wonder if maybe I have an unrealistic expectation that reading my Bible should always feel deeply personal and that I should be able to devote 100% of my concentration to it in the moment (In fact, this level of all-or-nothing thinking has led me to create a rule about only reading fiction in bed to fall asleep. I decided this because I told myself it was “wrong” or “irreverent” to be reading my Bible for the purpose of tiring my eyes and not to be fully alert and studying it. I’m actually rolling my eyes thinking about how absurd that logic is as I write it out. I also recognize that it’s a hallmark of my sin nature to not want to dig into the truth of Scripture when other temptations and distractions are available to me. In reality, I know it’s a combination of all of the above.

I was really encouraged this past week when I read a social media post from a Christian author that I enjoy, Rachel Jankovic, and I wanted to pass along her words to you.

“When it comes to the Bible, many Christians have forgotten how to simply read. We read newspapers, online articles, magazines, Instagram posts, blogs, recipes, novels, etc. etc. LIKE NORMAL READERS. And yet we feel that we haven’t “really read” the Bible unless we have journaled, checked commentaries, studied the Greek, listened to a sermon series, etc. That is how we have started to believe that reading the Bible is an undertaking too big to fit into our lives and schedules. We can’t block out several hours. We aren’t feeling smart or focused right now. (We are seldom feeling smart and focused!) We think we aren’t getting any value out of the text if we aren’t bringing ALL of our resources to it. But guess what?! God’s word brings the value to His word, not our brains. We don’t bestow on our reading the importance of it. Simply reading is not the only way to approach Scripture, but it seems to be the most forgotten one, and the most needed one. Nothing shows submission to the word quite like just showing up to let IT work on YOU instead of you coming in full steam to try to work on it…”

She went on to offer a summer Scripture reading challenge, encouraging her readers with the concept of “Just reading. Not going back to try to feel something more. Read it like you read anything. Read it! Read it with the assumption that you will be back later and you will notice more then! Read it like it is just food. Normal food!”

After reading this, I also remembered hearing a reminder in church that many of the books of the Bible were in fact letters written to Christian congregations. They were likely read straight through, and what was gleaned from that first reading was gleaned, and then those letters were read again and again, and new value and wisdom were gained from them. Out of curiosity, for what it would look like or feel like to read straight through one of Paul’s letters, I read through Ephesians (which was the Scripture reading challenge from Rachel Jankovic). It took me about 11 ½ minutes to read through the letter. It’s funny the power of thoughts too, because as I started out reading, I noticed something like the sensation of guilt or anxiety that I was allowing my eyes to glide over sentences without stopping to make sure I REALLY understood every single part of what was being said by Paul. It made me feel like I was cheapening the Scriptures, or not showing the appropriate reverence for God’s Word by not slowing down to do a more in depth study of these words. As I continued reading though, these sensations lessened and I was able to walk away from 11 ½ minutes spent in God’s Word with REAL wisdom and insight. This happened not because my brain processed the information quickly, but because, like Rachel stated in her post, “God’s word brings the value to His word, not our brains.” I know that when I go back and re-read this book, God will impart more wisdom and truth to me, and I will likely hear sermons preached on this book which will continue to open my eyes to the depths of this Scripture...but guess what?! My time wasn’t wasted because I was “just reading” the Scriptures. It is a lie of the enemy to keep me from God’s Word for fear of “not doing it right.” It is the desperate act of one who would love nothing more than to keep me from drawing nearer to my Father’s heart by reading his words as a part of my daily living pattern.

I have heard so many statements about reading the Bible, like “I just can’t understand it on my own, ” “I need to read devotionals/Christian books because they explain it in a way I can understand better,” “I want to study the Bible, but I don’t have time to go to Bible studies,” etc.

I think many of us have bought into this lie. I think many of us can relate to feeling like we’re “not doing it right” when it comes to reading Scripture. What would it look like if we let go of legalistic thinking related to “reading Scripture right” and simply read it? What would it look like if we challenged ourselves to replace that fictional book on our bed stand for our Bible? What could God do if we gave Him access to become a part of our daily living pattern, instead of feeling like we had to press pause on our daily living pattern to have access to Him? My bottom line encouragement to you and to myself is...just read your Bible.

—Lindsay Thompson

Complaining

I have a cute little country plaque on my kitchen wall that always makes me smile.

Sometimes I wake up Grouchy.  

Other times I let him sleep.

Kenny doesn’t find it quite as amusing as I do.

To be honest, for most of our nearly 49 years of marriage, Kenny was long gone before I even stirred in the morning. I didn’t have to wake him up ever; I have no idea what he was like when he hurried off to work each morning before the sun was even thinking of dawn.

I just thought the tiny sign was funny and I bought it. 

Probably, it resonated more with me about me than about him. Not a morning person by nature, I have to work at finding things NOT to be grumpy about when I roll out of bed.

Especially now.

My body, stiff and inflexible after hours of inactivity, stubbornly refuses to cooperate. My swollen fingers can’t twist the toothpaste cap. I can’t see to find my glasses so I can see to find my glasses. I glare at the saggy old lady in my mirror, the one with scraggly witch-hair sticking out all over her head. How many times did I get up last night? Acid reflux again?  Nothing fits! I’m too old to still be working. There’s no milk for my cereal. Why is it raining? I hate all this pollen. All my joints are aching…

Complain, complain, and complain! So who’s really the grouchy one? 

It’s so easy to get into the habit of moaning and groaning. It’s easy to find fault and be discontented, to be annoyed and impatient when things aren’t what I want or expect. It’s easy to be a serial complainer. Can you relate?   

And maybe, like me, you consider these little grumbles as harmless, a meaningless bantering between “me, myself, and I.” A venting. A purging. But is that true? Or could these whiny words be a warning that something sinister and ugly is going on in my heart?

Jesus says that from the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks (Matthew 12:34). What’s already inside there is what’s going to come out.

So what is happening in my heart? Why is it so easy to grumble?

Paul Tripp answered my questions in New Morning Mercies today.

“Well, (it’s) easy (to complain) because sin still causes us to make it all about us. Because sin really is selfishness at its core, we all still tend to shrink our worlds down to the small confines of our wants, our needs, and our feelings. We then tend to judge the good of our lives by how much of what we want we are able to actually have. At street level, it is tempting to live a God-forgetful, me-istic existence. If you put yourself in the center of your world, you will find plenty of things to complain about.

“It is also true that you live in a fallen world where people and things are not functioning the way God intended. This world really is terribly broken. Life here really is hard. You face all kinds of difficulties, big and small. People disappoint you…obstacles appear in your way. In some way, the fallenness of your world enters your door every day. Combine the hardships of life in this fallen world with the self-centeredness of sin and you have a recipe for disaster, or at least a miserable life of discontent.

“The Bible does not see grumbling and complaining as little things. In Deuteronomy 1, Moses recounts how the people of Israel ‘murmured’ about their lives, and embedded in that murmuring were questions about the goodness and wisdom of God. God’s assessment was that by their grumbling the people had rebelled against him; they had shown they were unwilling to do what he had called and enabled them to do. The joy or complaint of your heart always shapes your willingness to trust God and to do his will.

“Complaining forgets God’s grace. It ignores his presence. It fails to see the beauty of his promises. It allows the display of his splendor in creation to go unnoticed. It questions his goodness, faithfulness and love. It wonders if he is there and if he cares. If you believe in God and his control over everything that exists, then you have to accept that all of your grumbling is ultimately grumbling against him. Yes, it is so easy to complain. It is so easy to forget the daily blessings that fall down on each of us. Our readiness to complain is another argument for the forgiving and rescuing grace that Jesus, without complaint, willingly died to give us.”

I hate to think of my silly yet cantankerous grumbling as a sign that my heart, at best, is forgetful and ungrateful and, at worst, rebellious against GOD! Even when my complaints are most often uttered in my own bedroom, I know my Father can hear. I know they are pointing to a condition in my heart that needs attention. I must sound like a selfish brat. I’m sure my prayers are often like that as well. And how awful when I spread my discontent to my children or grandchildren…or others! Oh, Father forgive me! I don’t want to be an ungrateful Israelite—full of spiritual amnesia, forgetting Your daily deliverance and provision.

Yes, life isn’t a bowl of cherries. Sometimes we do have legitimate gripes and there are biblical ways to deal with those. But I think my murmuring often has much more to do with my personal preferences being ignored or my personal expectations of someone or something not being satisfied to please me. Sometimes I am just having a bad day and I see every situation from a glass-half-full perspective. Other times, I’m afraid it has become a nasty habit. Once in a while, with a group of negative people around, I find I am too easily influenced and can readily join in their grumping.

I, I, I. My, my, my. Me, me, me. Complain, complain, complain.  How thankless! How God-forgetful! And that’s my heart….

The same may be true of you. “A heart of gratitude and thankfulness isn’t dependent on your bank statement, doctor’s diagnosis, or the praise you receive for a job well done. Thanklessness and grumbling—regardless of your situation, even your suffering—reflect your heart. They are sin. Spiritual amnesia is a deadly disease that threatens your faith and your joy more than any cancer. It penetrates to the core and rots your heart from within.” (Steven Lee)

So what can I do? What can we do? How can we root out the evil spiritual amnesia that threatens our faith and our joy and is revealed in our outward murmuring?

Remember!

The antidote is to simply remember God’s gracious redemption, provision, and deliverance. Every day. Read about it, study it, write it, reflect on it, verbalize it, teach it, memorize it. Live it!

“Take a moment and look back on God’s fingerprints all over your life:

*Remember how God has protected you from making shipwreck of your life.

*Remember how God graciously let you grow up in a godly family.

*Remember how God awakened you to the ugliness of your sin.

*Remember how you walked away from that terrible car crash.

*Remember how your wife, sister or mom survived breast cancer.

*Remember how you had mentors and key friends guide you in your faith.

*Remember how God sustained you during that season of unemployment.

*Remember how God miraculously healed you.

*Remember that impossible prayer request that God answered.

*Remember how you had no money and an envelope just showed up in the mail with exactly what you needed.

*Remember how the Gospel came alive as it never had before.

*Remember God.

The antidote to spiritual amnesia is making every effort to recall and remember God’s gracious deliverance. The fact that you—a sinner who was an enemy of God—are now a beloved child is a miracle. Don’t let that wonder every fade. Remember.

Let this act of remembering awaken in you joy in God and a deep sense of gratitude that God loves you, knows you, and keeps you.” (Steven Lee)

Then you will be so busy rehearsing your blessings, you won’t have any time to list your frivolous and me-istic complaints. I won’t either.

After all, nobody wants that corny little plaque in my kitchen to be true of them, right?

—Eileen Hill

Why I Listen to Christian Music

“Set your mind on things above, not on things on the earth.” – Colossians 3:2

I have been down a journey of different types of music through the years. I have always thought that my music preferences should be made up from a balance of genres that I like, and if I’m working with a worship team, Christian music must be a part of that balance. But now that I have been through a lot of that journey (and I’m sure there is still more to come), I can see that God wants me to listen to Christian music. Here’s why:

First of all, Christian music keeps my affections on things above, i.e. Col. 3:2.  I always thought it said, “Set your heart on things above.”  Eh, nope. It says ‘affections’ or ‘mind’, as other translations have it. You could say, “What I love is to be about things above.”  Also in Romans 12:2, “Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to discern what is the good, pleasing, and perfect will of God.” So in the Christian music world, it points to God or Jesus Christ, worship and surrender. As I listen, there are reminders and encouragements that are all uplifting to my spirit. There is a lot of ‘Transforming by the Renewing of Your Mind’ going on, so in my life, music becomes the vehicle of keeping my mind pointed toward my true love, Christ.

Also, all the other music is what I would call shallow or hollow. It’s just music that in most cases appeals to feelings or emotions. It’s a very temporary satisfaction, if it even satisfies at all. Even when I’m humming a tune later on, it feels shallow and my mind is usually not looking up. However, throughout the day as I listen to Christian music, and I am humming a song of worship, it helps keep my spirit joyful and positive, even when there is no music. As I have been growing in the Lord, I am seeing that my heart desires the worship that is in Christian music. There’s a fullness that satisfies the soul. That’s powerful. When something gets slammed on me at work, and it all seems impossible and things can go easily down the path of frustration…Nope. “And I ran out of that Grave! Out of the darkness…Into Your glorious day!”, Hallelujah!

How else can Christian music have a positive effect in my life? As time goes on, I have been listening to Christian radio stations quite a few hours at work each day. A lot of great music plays on that station, but one other thing that happens right along with the music is that I periodically hear testimonies of how God has worked things out in the callers’ lives, and even in those times when I’m feeling trapped, frustrated or even angered, and I’m trying to trust Him in personal things, there’s a caller who states their story and it’s an, “Oh wow!” moment with me. It reminds me of the truth and power of God that’s right here with me. God’s not dead, He’s surely alive!

So here’s one area of life we can embrace Colossians 3:2 in our walk with Christ.  “I am redeemed, You set me free!”

—Brian Rainey

I Heard the Voice of Jesus Say...

I have literally have started to write this blog four different times, thinking I knew how it should begin, but each time right clicked and hovered over the “cut” prompt and tapped my touchpad on the computer…with no words typed out except …

‘I heard the voice of Jesus say…’

In all reality, all that is all really important to me right now is what Jesus says to me. That is how I live my life. It is a choice every day. Even today, I have made that choice. But it is not easy sometimes. My current reality looks like this…

I’m looking at a cheeseburger with a lettuce bun wrapped around it because I have decided, with the help of my best friend Jessica, to start the journey of being gluten free. Looking for gluten free items in a grocery store can be daunting at times when you are an avid bread lover like I am. Some stores, I’m told, have a gluten free section in order to make shopping a bit easier. But others have the items spread thinly throughout the store. It becomes like a scavenger hunt, looking for that little tiny dark brown tag under the grocery item of choice. Then, when you and your friends decide to order pizza, (yay, let’s get some pizza!), well, this is another lesson I have come to be aware of. A small, gluten free cauliflower crusted pizza that is only made in a personal pan size is the same price as a large regular pie for 8 people. $13.99 to be exact, and that does not include toppings.

It becomes overwhelming and frustrating.

Some of you have followed my physical journey for the last eight years. It has been very difficult. I shared with my band last night, in tears, that I am so confused and frustrated that no matter how many times I have been prayed for, anointed with oil and cried out to God, He has not healed me yet. I know He can just say the Word and it will be done. He has done that very thing, healed me miraculously on the spot twice before. I stood, and still stand, amazed. He is God, the Great I Am. The Good Father, Faithful, Just, Merciful and Forgiving. Loving, Kind, Compassionate, King of Kings and Lord of Lords. My Savior and King, forever. Those are the facts. They never have nor will change. No matter what emotions or thoughts you or I have. But,

It becomes overwhelming and frustrating.

The most recent findings from my Rheumatologist up at Cooper is that I have fibromyalgia, which got diagnosed 25 years ago, and the autoimmune disease Rheumatoid Arthritis. Basically, my cells are attacking my joints all over my body. So, I started the new RA drug this very morning. It comes with its concerns. I had to get the retinas of my eyes examined before I could go on it since it can damage your retinas, which is irreversible. So, it is a big deal to me.

It becomes overwhelming and frustrating.

So, what do I do with all of this overwhelming and frustrating stuff? I cry. I talk to Jesus all day, in and out of conversations with Him, knowing that it is only going to be through Him that I will have any clarity to this confusing journey I am on. Last night at band practice, the drummer stopped drumming and said, “Lois is real quiet over there on that keyboard.” Then, our leader stopped and said she wasn't going to play another note but just look at me. As she did, I began to cry. God worked through my band last night to minister to my heart. They prayed over me, again.

Then, as I left my home today, I talked with my best friend Jessica. I cried and cried, telling her how overwhelmed I am, how frustrated and confused I am in all of this. As I collected myself and proceeded to drive out of the driveway, I said to Jesus, “I feel like I am having a breakdown…” and just as clear as can be, I heard immediately, “You are having a BREAKTHROUGH”. I was so full of joy that it wasn't a breakdown that I was experiencing but a breakthrough, allowing my heart to feel the sorrow over brokenness. I long for all things to be made right, to have broken things put back into order, working the way they were originally made to. Before sin, pain and death entered the world. FOR  ALL THINGS TO BE RECONCILED BACK TO THE FATHER.

When I heard the voice of Jesus say that, the confusion that was present began to clear. The frustration turned to joy.

2 Corinthians 1:5 says this , “5 For just as we share abundantly in the sufferings of Christ, so also our comfort abounds through Christ.  

I came to realize that the overwhelmed and frustrated feelings I have been having due to limitations my earthly body experiences, are a form of the above verse. It made sense to me because He allowed it to. My Good Father showed up and was faithful to show His daughter what was going on. My tears of confusion and sadness turned into tears of relief. He knows. He sees. He understands. He gets it. And I am ever so grateful that my God, my King, my Savior is Jesus Christ that knows me like that.

This week, I celebrate Jesus, just as every other week of the year. But, this week has some very special aspects that we celebrate. This is what happened 2000 years ago on my behalf and your behalf. Everyone's behalf for that matter. Jesus Christ, God’s son, willingly went to the cross on behalf of each one of us. To die a gruesome death in order to pay for all of the things that are broken, diseased, sick and sinful that ultimately led to death. Things that are not like God, the things we have done wrong called sin, and the wrongs done to us - He died for them ALL. He then came back to life, having victory over death and offering life in heaven with Him forever. You can have a personal relationship with Him as well. You can learn to hear His voice. During those times when you're overwhelmed and frustrated in the midst of your suffering, you too can have what I have. He loves you just as much as me or anyone else. He made you and loves you. That is the fact, no matter what you feel or think. You too can have the same HOPE I have…

If you say, “Yes, Jesus,

I want to live my life learning how to

hear your voice and follow you.

Amen and Amen.”

—Lois Robinson

I DIDN’T DO IT!!!!

Were you ever blamed for something you didn’t do?

My brother (nineteen months older) hardly ever originated the misbehavior we got into, but he usually went right along with whatever I thought up. That was my job; I was more inventive. Of course my Mom knew all about me, and punishment usually fell with more force upon me! But I had a bad habit with which I handled these situations. I always knew what would happen if I got caught, and I weighed my options; if it wasn’t worth it, I didn’t do it! And if I thought it might be worth it, IF I got caught, it was full steam ahead.

So, I clearly remember a time when my brother actually talked ME into something. We rode our bikes down Germantown Avenue, which we definitely were not allowed to do (we were young), because he wanted to look at a balsa model in a toy store. I wasn’t interested, but I went along anyway. But who did we see, and who saw us and would report us to our mother, but a nosey neighbor! That evening did not promise to be pleasant.

Mom was waiting for us when we got home. The reason we were down there never came up, but she immediately pinned me to the wall with that look, and sent us to our rooms. My brother, the rat, did not confess or mention toy stores, and since my mother’s focus was on who instigated the crime, she somewhat naturally landed on me. And I was the one who lost the use of my bike for a week, during which time I did not speak to my brother.

I know it doesn’t even compare, but I often ponder the life-changing sacrifice Jesus made for us. He knew what crucifixion was; it was horrible, but not uncommon. But complete separation from God? Separation from the very part of Himself which He treasured most? To the place where He cried out to His Father, “Why have you deserted me?!” How could He have known in advance how awful that would be? And then, unbelievable and even incomprehensible to us, this God/man who had NEVER sinned was accounted guilty of every human sin, past, present and future! He bore that burden in His heart and on His shoulders, for us. For us. Because God loves us that much. And because Jesus agreed to pay for us. And did, for agonizing hours on the cross. Until He was finally, finally able to say, “It is finished.”

How can we ever consider this lightly? How can we not shudder as we try, unsuccessfully, to imagine what that must have been like! If we have ever borne the blame for another’s action, we must know that we are no closer to any understanding of the tremendous part Jesus played in God’s plan to bring us, purified, into His presence, justified and worthy to spend eternity with our God and Savior. We can only bow in grateful praise to God for caring for us enough, and wanting our companionship enough, to sacrifice the perfect Lamb, His Son, for us, unworthy as we are in our own sinful nature. And for us never to die! Oh, unless Jesus comes back first, our bodies will surely die, but we won’t need them any more! When Jesus rose again on Easter morning, He conquered death for us! Our souls will not die! We will be ushered into the presence of God, to live there in new, strong bodies, forever!

 HALLELUIA!                                                                                                                    

—Norma Stockton

Acknowledging the Savior Right With Me

Last week I sat in my cozy gray chair. No one else was up. It was dark. It was my favorite time of day in my home: dark and silent and still. I opened up my Bible application on my phone to that day’s Lent reading. 

As I sat there, in the quiet of the still-sleeping house, I felt moved in my spirit by the words about Jesus…the words about His sacrifice for me. I even had tears come to my eyes. I lingered over the thoughts for a few more moments, and then I went to click off my phone and get ready for the day.

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But then it hit me. Like a bucket of cold water had literally been dumped over my head all of the sudden.

Those moments were special, and yes, I was drinking in some important truths at the level of my cognition, and the truths even impacted my emotions. 

But I was, without even noticing, ready to leave the time I had set aside to be alone with my Savior, the One who made me, happy to have just interacted with truth…and not directly, face to face, with the person of Jesus, who was the whole time right there with me. 

Yes, the Holy Spirit was with me, leading me into truth. His softening of my heart and awakening my cognition to teaching me is a GIFT beyond what I can thank Him for.

But I am realizing that my tendency is to interact with knowledge and truth…and not with the actual presence of Jesus. I read and I learn and I understand and I even have emotions…and then I walk away without ever turning to the One who the knowledge is about, without ever experiencing the company and gift of His presence. 

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So what I did was very simple. I stayed a few more moments in my gray chair. I closed my eyes, and I said “Jesus.”

And I paused. I let myself realize that He was right there, with me.

And I said, “Jesus. Thank You for what You are saying to me this morning.” And I told Him what had touched my emotions, what had stuck out to my cognition.

And after a little while, then I got up from my chair.

—Sarah Howard

The Path of Integrity

Proverbs 10:9 “Whoever walks in integrity walks securely,

but whoever takes crooked paths will be found out”

The other day my father was going to paint the floors in his business, and because I use the place for some personal vehicle maintenance after hours, I thought it would be a cool thing to stop by and help out. “Need help?”…Sure! My son Matthew works there, so he was asked to help. My son and father spent the day before sanding all the floors, so they were ready for paint. I looked over the paint supplies he had and there was only one roller with a pole handle. My son grabbed that and starts out in the back. Looks like I get the brush. I said, “Hold up; we have to cut some things in before you go at it and roller us right into a corner.” So I crawled back into this place that only construction guys have seen; it’s under a stairway back a long shelved out hallway in a storeroom. This spot is where boxes of antifreeze are stored. I don’t even think my father has been in that place. Spider webs, dust on the walls, painting slop everywhere, but the floor was clean as it could be. So in the visible parts I did some great cut in lines where they needed to be and when I got to the part that no one sees, I paused. There are going to be boxes and supplies in front of all the attempted artwork I was about to do. I was lying on my side and not so comfortable. I could have been sloppy just like the old paint that’s there and ‘get’er done’... or… <big pause> “Lord, beside doing a perfect job with this, what would you do?”  The next thing I thought of was “Walk in Integrity”. It was that little whisper. Do just as good a job back here as out there where everyone sees. With that thought I started to cut-in the edges like they should be.

I could have done anything that day, but the thing I remember most was not that I was even there, but that “I walked in the path of integrity” when the temptation to do otherwise was there. Another building block in the foundation of my life. As I’m writing this, I’m reminded of the Matthew 7:24-27 verses that discuss what happens when a man builds his house on the rock verses building his house on the sand. Notice the similarity with Proverbs 10:9? Rock vs sand, security vs exposure, stability vs destruction. And in a neat implication, it’s a building process.

Is our journey through this life providing building blocks for eternity’s sake? Will whatever we are doing stand the storms of life? Are we building on the Rock?

Back to the painting story…then my son goes back in that hole and paints the floor. What he didn’t see was a “who cares sloppy mess”.  He saw “a walk in integrity “ ( I didn’t see that coming at all ).

Thank you Lord for planting those verses in my heart and giving me direction.

—Brian Rainey

Lindsay, Wait on Me

I’m going to give you a glimpse into what is happening in the very moments that I am writing this blog. It is 12:56 pm on Monday afternoon. I am sitting at my kitchen table on my laptop, staring at a blank page and feeling nervous that I don’t have a clear sense of what God wants me to write in this blog post. I’m also aware of competing responsibilities for today, that my children will arrive home at 3:30, that we have gymnastics practice, homework, and dinner… Sometimes I sit down with a very clear sense of where God is leading, and other times, well, it’s like today.

Let me give you a little background to this picture. Over the past week, knowing that I have a blog due this Tuesday, I’ve been seeking God in prayer, worshipping, listening intently as to what He would have me write about. There have been a few thoughts that have been in my mind, areas that God has been impressing on my heart that are clearly significant and meaningful, and things that He would want me to press into and to encourage others in…but as intensely significant as the messages seem, I also feel like He is saying, “Lindsay, wait on Me”.

I’m sure there are many reasons God asks me to wait, but I have noticed that sometimes I hear this from God when I have an incomplete understanding of what He is saying to me. One reason that I may have an incomplete idea of what He is saying to me is because I am often in the thick of my sanctification process on those specific issues, and He knows that my words would be insufficient if not outright harmful to the body of Christ if I did not wait until His timing matched His message.

I will readily admit that there would be some sense of finality that would feel relieving for me to simply write on one of those topics and hope for the best. Kind of like the equivalent of a buzzer beater shot at a basketball game, “Here goes nothing… I guess if God wants it to work out, it’ll work out.” Please hear me - I do believe that God can redeem everything and anything to bring about His kingdom purposes, but I also believe that there is spiritual wisdom and a deeper intimacy with God conveyed by not just asking the question “God, is this the right message?” but also asking “God, is this the right timing?”   

I’m learning to love when I hear God tell me to “wait”. Trust me, it’s not always a default reaction to that command, but it often develops into a precious reminder of God’s love for His people and God’s protection over His flock. It also creates a sense of expectancy within myself related to God’s promise to never forsake me as He helps me to work out my salvation with fear and trembling.

I am very aware that the same message given to the same person, at different points in their life, can create VERY different outcomes. I see this all the time in the counseling room. You see, God’s not just sanctifying and refining you in this process, He is also working in the heart of the hearer, preparing them to be able to receive His message. I’m reminded of the parable of the sower in Matthew 13. It isn’t the focal point of the parable, but if the sower was sowing seed that was not yet ready or prepared to be sown, it would have never created a crop; it would be incomplete, not useful, because it has not had time to be properly prepared. The seed is still the same, it’s the timing of the process that is off. Likewise, God is at work, according to His will, creating fertile soil so that His message can take root and His name can be glorified above all else.

It’s 2:23 now. God has soothed all worry and thoughts about competing responsibilities and timelines, and given me rest from the familiar question of “what do I write, God?” from this past week. As I re-read and prayed over these words before sending them off, I am struck by God’s faithfulness and His love in the lesson of waiting by not answering my prayers in the way I had hoped at the outset of this blog, and I pray that you are equally as blessed by His faithfulness.

 —Lindsay Thompson