(By Diego Cuartas)
From time to time certain words draw my attention because they are not necessarily words we find explicitly in the biblical. For instance, I have never come across the word balance, as in live a well-balanced life. Or try the word boundaries, as in live with boundaries or within boundaries for your own good and the good of others. I do realize that these concepts are welcomed in some way by our American culture. I am not down on these concepts. What I want to do is from time to time come back with safeguards found in the Word of God to help us keep our understanding and practice of these concepts under check. Why keep them under check? Because something good such as boundaries could become self-serving or feed our self-focused tendencies in life.
For today, I want to focus on a few thoughts shared by the apostle Paul to help us x-ray our understanding and implementation of personal boundaries. Romans 15:1-7 says:
We who are strong have an obligation to bear with the failings of the weak, and not to please ourselves. Let each of us please his neighbor for his good, to build him up. For Christ did not please himself, but as it is written, “The reproaches of those who reproached you fell on me.” For whatever was written in former days was written for our instruction, that through endurance and through the encouragement of the Scriptures we might have hope. May the God of endurance and encouragement grant you to live in such harmony with one another, in accord with Christ Jesus, that together you may with one voice glorify the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ.
Test #1: Do you use boundaries in your life to avoid “bearing with the failings of the weak”? In verses 1 and 5 Paul points us to build others up, seek their good and live in harmony with each other. Boundaries should help us reenergize so that we can re-engage community, not live in isolation.
Test #2: Do you use boundaries to “please yourself”? In verses 2 and 3 we see that Jesus set an example in terms of living a life that was not about pleasing himself. He even allowed reproaches that were aimed to his father to fall on himself. Boundaries should help us seek our well-being and the well-being of others.
Test #3: Do you lean on boundaries as your “hope” or safety in life? In verses 4 and 5 Paul affirms that God is the source of endurance and encouragement. In this context, encouragement comes to us via the revealed Word of God. Boundaries should help us realign our hope in God.
Test #4: Do your boundaries serve just you or your community at large? Verse 5 calls us to engage community “in accord with Christ Jesus”. Verses 6 and 7 offer a picture of what happens when we live in “harmony” with others: God will be glorified by the community and we will grow in welcoming each other. Boundaries should help us offer others in our community a quality of life set by Jesus.
Stay tuned. In my next blog I hope to give an example of how I have misused boundaries in my life. I will also illustrate beautiful things that have happened when I have used boundaries well.
