Since being reclaimed and redeemed by Jesus when I was 16 years old, I have struggled with insecurities surrounding my Biblical knowledge. After beholding God in the face of Jesus, I realized that the words of the Bible, those which were once dead to me, were my new Father’s words. As my hunger to know His word grew, so did the shame of my lack of knowledge.
As I tried to learn more, every sermon preached or Bible study attended would begin with a request by the teacher for me to turn to a book, chapter, and verse that would take me forever to find. As I started to attend church, little children next to me would raise their hands to answer questions about biblical characters I had never heard of. Every Bible story was new to me, and I often did not have much context to interpret the main points accurately. These experiences were constant reminders of my ignorance. I was literally a 16-year-old babe in need of milk, and this led to hidden shame. I cried out to my new Father for mercy, patience, protection, and assistance as I tried to make up for so many lost years.
Here is a quick story of how God answered my prayers in a big way in a simple verse. A few years after being born again in Christ, I attended a Bible study led by a resident assistant in my college dormitory. At the end of the study, the leader pulled out a bunch of pictures from his bag. Each picture was of a Bible verse surrounded by a uniquely decorated frame. As a member of the soccer team, I immediately reached for the soccer ball frame. It was here that I first read James 1:5.
“If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.”
As I read this verse, God spoke deep into my heart. He would generously give me wisdom without finding fault if I asked Him.
If you are wrestling with shame today because you feel you should know more than you do, ask the Lord for wisdom. He is able to redeem the past and can make up for lost time. If we have questions without answers, it is never too late for Him to make us wise. Do we believe He can and will do this?
In Christ,
—Roger Garrison
