(By Diego Cuartas)
Just this morning, I was fretting. While I was considering the different things that were in my day, I was feeling like I had little margin for anything else. It is in this context that I fretted because of some comments my wife made that I was interpreting as demands or expectations on her part. When I get to this point I'm recognizing that I am not as a loving in my responses to my wife. I offer short answers; I get frustrated and deep inside annoyed by the circumstances. I also think there is a belief going through my head regarding what I assess as unfair or unjust. An undercurrent line that says, "It is not fair that these things are being imposed on me at this moment!". And I find myself reacting to that.
So as I found a few minutes to slow down, before taking care of some lab work, I sensed God prompting me through His Spirit to read Psalm 23. This chapter is packed with with descriptions of who God is and what He is doing all the time--now and future. The following verbs or actions give me insight into who He is and what He is doing in every circumstance--including those when I am fretting:
- He is my shepherd and addresses my needs
- He is able to lead me to places of nourishment and rest
- He leads and restores my soul
- His guidance in my life is aligned with the pursuit of His good fame
- He is present with me through correction and offers me comfort
- He is my defender and bestower of blessings in my life to the point of satisfaction
- He is committed to offer me goodness and mercy into my future days
- And all this drama of life will end up with me and Him together living eternally--with this kind of Shepherd!
In light of these realities, I can ask myself the following questions in my moments of fretting--and use them to X-Ray my heart and hopefully realign my thoughts with Him and be able to live hopefully, in gratitude and loving others well:
- Who do I believe is with me in this moment?
- What do I think I am entitled to? And who do I believe is responsible for delivering that to me?
- Who is in control of my present?
- Who can seek my best "good" and actually secure it for me?
- Where can I find true rest and peace?
- What do I believe I have to be in this situation or what do I believe I must do to come out of it ok?
- Who do I believe will secure justice for me?
- If God is this good and gracious to me, how can I be good and gracious to others in this moment?
May God help us believe that we can live as people who have a Good Shepherd--who oversees and cares for us--rather than living life as an orphan who believes that life, good and justice depends on our own efforts. Fretting will turn into trusting!