Counting the Cost

Only wanting to give sparingly

Wanting to keep something back for myself 

Not wanting to surrender unconditionally 

Keeping something back for myself.

Yet I thought I was willing to give all.

The Lord had shown me my heart,

Is that what I'm really like?! 

I had said...I want You to be the 

Delight of my heart,

My everything,

My all, 

But You showed me

It wasn't what was deep in my heart. 

I was holding back,

Keeping something for myself. 

Even now not sure if

I can honestly go there.

The cost is higher than I thought. 

Lord make me willing

To stop counting the cost

And come to you unreservedly. 

You see, I want my freedom,

To be able to come and go as I please 

But Satan is deceiving me.

It’s a false freedom.

He will take me further away from Jesus 

And more into myself.

So, a slave to Satan and self

Or a slave to Jesus. 

What is it going to be?

I didn't have time

I was being self indulgent 

Gratifying myself.

What's my story?

What really matters to me? 

There I go again, waxing lyrical. But this was a very real moment in my life and continues to be something I have to ask myself. 

There was one significant moment when the Lord challenged me. Like the rich young ruler I was excited about going deeper with the Lord, to make Him the delight of my heart. Then He spoke to me, “This is not who you really are,” and He showed me my heart. I was crestfallen. 

I knew there were things I struggled with but, until that moment, I didn’t realize how much I clung onto them. How those idols had become so entrenched in my heart. It seemed there was only so much I was willing to give, and I was being asked to go beyond that. 

The deeper life was going to cost more than I was willing to pay. But, that’s ok, I would be a “nominal” Christian. “I still love you Lord,” but from the back row. It was the best I could do, and, after all, I wouldn’t be alone. 

If you look up the definition of the word, nominal, it states; 1. A role or status existing in name only. 2. A price far below the real value or cost. 

To be called a Christian in name only and not be willing to pay the cost. How could I be considering this as an option? 

Jesus doesn’t argue with you. He reaches out and says, “Come.” 

I knew that I couldn’t walk away. I had known Jesus for too long. I knew Him, and know Him, and deep down in my heart I love Him. He is the One who is altogether beautiful and paid a great price for me. So, with some hesitation I started in that direction, started to release my grip on some things. 

I'm still on that journey. It hasn’t always been pretty, and I’m often slow to let go, but I want Him to have my heart. Thankfully, the Lord is patient and kind. He is the One who is altogether merciful, slow to anger, and abounding in steadfast love. 

I’m so thankful for that. 

—Mick Sanderson

The Message of The Resurrected Christ

I am journaling these thoughts on Resurrection Sunday. What would Jesus have said to us if we were there for His resurrection? 

There are several things He said to His disciples. I find it interesting that we often talk about Matthew 28 as a Great Communion passage without leaning on what the gospel of John has to say about it.

Here is what I hear Jesus saying to His disciples, in John 20, back then, and perhaps we can hear Him speak those same things to us today:

“I am ascending to my Father and your Father, to my God and your God.” (17). I think Jesus wanted His disciples and us grounded in the fact that Jesus’ Father is our Father and Jesus’ God is our God. That in the same way He has access to Him we too can have access to Him.

“Peace be with you!” (19). I believe Jesus wants us to be people marked by peace. This is a peace that is grounded in who He is, not in our circumstances. What kind of peace can someone who laid down His life and raised it back again can possibly give us? Obviously He can give peace in a limitless way!!!

It is interesting to notice that Jesus speaks peace a second time over His disciples, but this time He follows it up with, “As the Father has sent me, even so I am sending you.” (21). The work of Christ at the cross makes possible our reconciliation with the Father. However, by that same work we are thrusted, commissioned, to partner with Jesus in this world to do the kind of ministry He already did on our behalf. 

“Receive the Holy Spirit. If you forgive anyone’s sins, their sins are forgiven; if you do not forgive them, they are not forgiven.” (22-23). Jesus fulfilled the promised He had made before His death that He would give His disciples another counselor, one just like Him! But He also is taking the time to commission His disciples and us to be dispensers of forgiveness. Yes, that is right, we are dispensers of forgiveness. Our world needs agents of forgiveness modeling the mercies of our Savior as we ourselves have been forgiven and given grace. As we are commissioned, we are also given the life, power, and presence of the Holy Spirit to enable us to live out this commissioning. 

“Blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed.” (29). I think Jesus would also say to us today how valuable faith is in His sight. Believing before we see with our eyes is essential to our faith; it is our faith.

Let’s recap:

You have a Father.

I am your source of Peace.

I am sending you into the world.

The Holy Spirit is given to you.

Steward forgiveness to the world.

Believe even when your eyes don’t see.

As I see it in this passage, the impact resurrection has in our lives is pretty signifiant. From being orphans to being adopted; from anxiety to peace; from building our own kingdoms to serving with our King; from living self-dependent to relying on God; from entitlement to being merciful and gracious people; from a humanistic life to a faith-filled life.

Does your Christian faith align with these messages from Jesus? 

Which one of these messages are you finding most difficult to embrace or live out?

In what ways would you like to ask the Holy Spirit to enable you to live out these messages?

May we hear the messages of our Resurrected Jesus!

Hands Like His

There is a story told about the bombing of a city in World War ll. A massive, marble statue of Jesus was nearly destroyed. Digging through the rubble the following morning, the townspeople found the pieces of the damaged sculpture and, hearts broken, began to collectively mourn. The statue had long been a symbol of their faith and of God’s presence in their lives. 

Experts and craftsmen were surprisingly able to restore most of the figure, but its hands had been broken so badly, they were beyond repair. Eventually, someone placed a thought-provoking sign at base of the statue of Jesus that read: “You are my hands.”

Which begs the question, “Are you?”

During this sobering season of Lent, I often find myself thinking of Jesus and all the people He touched during His three-year ministry on planet Earth. How many blind eyes received vision at His touch? How many leprous bodies were healed? How many hungry were fed as His hands broke loaves and fish? How many twisted legs were straightened? How many dear children were held and blessed?

He was tireless in His work, the work His Father had given Him to do here. Work that compelled Him by His great love for us to willingly surrender those healing, gentle hands to Roman spikes. Yes, He finished His work of reconciliation and rescue of mankind at the cross.

He has the nail-scarred hands to prove it.

But my work isn’t finished.

Listen to what Ephesians 2:10 in the Message says, “(God) creates each of us by Christ Jesus to join him in the work he does, the good work he has gotten ready for us to do, work we had better be doing.”

Like that sign on the sculpture reminds us, “You are my hands.” What work or service or touch would His hands be about in your neighborhood, in your school, at your job, in your home, or at your church today? Whatever He would be doing, wherever He would be at work, whomever He would be “touching,” that’s where we should be and what we should be doing too. There is a lot of “good work” to be done and our Father planned for us to accomplish it. He intends to keep our hands very busy. What a privilege…

Won’t you think of ways you can be His hands right now?  Write that card, bake that pie, rake that yard, babysit that child, drive that neighbor, touch that hand, or knock on that door. The needs are great; the laborers few.

Can He count on you?

Can He count on me?

Will you surrender your hands and be His?

Let the favor of the Lord our God be upon us, and establish the work of our hands…    (Psalm 90:17)

—Eileen Hill

Thy Will Be Done…

In Deuteronomy 8:15-16, Moses reminds the Israelites about the works of God.  It is written:

“He brought you water out of hard rock. He gave you manna to eat in the wilderness, something your ancestors had never known, to humble and test you so that in the end it might go well with you.”

God’s ways are not our ways. His thoughts are not our thoughts. As we read Deuteronomy, and the rest of God’s Word, we learn that sometimes, He will lead us into a wilderness to humble and test us so that it might go well with us in the end. Sometimes broken things must be taken apart to be put back together. This difficult truth makes it imperative that we heed Jesus’s example and pray not my will, but Thy will be done.    

 If you are anything like me, I often think God’s will does not involve wilderness experiences for myself or others. My definition of goodness and mercy often does not include a time of suffering, especially not long-suffering. Usually, I seek paradise more than manna in a desert. I want the finished product without the work. This desire to fix things quickly is dangerous in a world of quick fixes. In Paul’s letter to Timothy, he informs him that there will be some, especially in the last days, that will not want to hear the entire truth about God. He says that, having itching ears, they will accumulate for themselves teachers to suit their own passions, and turn away from listening to the truth and wander off into myths.  

One myth we must avoid is believing that our will and God’s will are currently perfectly aligned.

Since our will is not perfect like His, our authority in Jesus’s name must always be balanced with humility. This is important in a world filled with mascots and hype men, who know how to get our passion and pride elevated. Paul reminds Timothy to stay sober-minded, endure suffering, do the work of an evangelist, and to fulfill his ministry. 

I can imagine the Spirit speaking similar words to Caleb and Joshua for the forty years in the desert. There were probably days that it was difficult to stay-sober minded, endure suffering, testify to the goodness of God, and stay with others in their suffering. I believe their trust in God’s faithfulness helped them to seek His will and not their own. They were convinced that God would keep His word and bring them into the promised land. However, in humility, they found rest in God’s process. God provides a way IN the desert, not just a way out. He can help us step into and stay in a trial of our own or that of another.

On more than one occasion in the scriptures, Jesus asked His Father to be delivered from suffering. In these moments, I believe the depth of His suffering was greater than any suffering any human has ever experienced. Remarkably, in these moments Jesus was able to focus on something bigger than His suffering. He remained focused on the will of His Father being done. From Jesus we learn that we can approach the Father boldly, with confidence in His love and faithfulness; AND BECAUSE of this, we come humbly, submitting to His will, even if He doesn’t remove our “cup” from us. Jesus teaches us to pray, “Not my will, but Thy will be done.”

 May we not seek deliverance from our trials without the humility to declare “not my will, but thy will be done.” God is the refiner. As we bring Him our requests, may we not take the flame from His hands.

 In Christ,

 —Roger Garrison

*Please be advised that this blog represents the views, opinions and beliefs of the writer and does not necessarily reflect those of our church leadership or denominational affiliation.