The other Wednesday evening at Open Door, Angelo read some verses from the Song of Songs. This was one of them.
Catch the foxes for us, the little foxes that spoil the vineyards, for our vineyards are in blossom. (Song of Songs 2:15 ESV)
Immediately, a long-forgotten memory from my childhood popped into my mind. It was a brisk and blustery fall afternoon. Daddy loaded us in the old Ford for a pleasant ride through the countryside to enjoy the changing, colorful leaves of autumn. That day, he made a point of traveling a backroad that wound its way to a farm near Palatine, the home of a friend. There on the corner, hanging by their bushy tails, was a string of dead red foxes swaying in the breeze, proud trophies from the first day of hunting season. I don’t know if this part of my recollection has been exaggerated in my quite lively imagination or if this is the truth, but I recall it being a horribly bloody and unsettling scene. I hated to look at the lifeless, dripping bodies, yet I simply couldn’t turn away.
It was a striking picture of death.
This picture of gory foxes in a row is often what I think about, see in my mind’s eye, when I hear the word foxes. And in the context of the verse Angelo read, I have an inkling of why that’s okay. It seems these pesky, little foxes, the size of a small dog, can wreak havoc in our beautiful, thriving gardens or vineyards if we are not watchful and proactive in getting rid of them. Yes, they do chew and eat the new shoots on the vine and even the tasty fruit it produces, grapes included. Yes, they burrow and dig, destroying roots in their search for grubs and other food, causing the vines to wither and become unproductive. Though they are not usually regarded as dangerous, little foxes are capable of terribly big damage.
So what does it all mean to me today? To us?
In the context, two lovers are speaking intimate words of passionate desire for one another, when, out of nowhere it seems to me, this verse pops up. Could it be they understood that even a beautiful, fresh, and growing relationship, a relationship that is healthy and delightfully blooming, can suffer attack and potentially be ruined by “little foxes,” the kinds of problems or sins which can disturb or destroy good relationships? They were wise if that’s what they were thinking. Way ahead of most of us, I’m afraid.
Because we should think this way too.
It isn’t always BIG things that cause us the most trouble in our relationships. Often we are able to see those huge, obvious trouble-makers coming at us and have time to put up our defenses, cry for help, polish our armor and wage war. But It’s the little things that creep, unnoticed, into our unprotected relationships that can cause much grief and pain. Even ruin. And unlike the sweet lovers in the Songs, we aren’t even worried about them. We are oblivious. Lazy. Unconcerned. Busy elsewhere. Unprepared. Something…
Like me, if you think about it, I’m guessing you can identify many “little foxes” that have quite successfully intruded upon our relationships and, at the very least, left behind a mess. Unchecked, they even can grow into huge and hungry foxes that want to ultimately destroy our gardens. These include foxes like anger, fear, passivity, stubbornness, control, selfishness, busyness, pride, bad habits, unrealistic expectations, poor communication, discourtesy, complacency, jealousy, lust, greed, bitterness, dishonesty, conflicting agendas, and on and on their number goes.
Scripture specifically identifies a little tongue (James 3:5), a little folly (Ecclesiastes 10:1), and a little sleep (Proverbs 24:33,34) as a few more examples of small things that cause extensive damage in relational gardens. None of these should be invading our homes; they shouldn’t be digging their way into our marriages, devouring what once was blooming and beautiful, leaving behind ruined vines. Ruined fruit. Ruined relationships. Ruined marriages. Ruined lives.
Hudson Taylor said it this way.
“The enemies may be small, but the mischief done great…And how numerous the little foxes are! Little compromises with the world; disobedience to the still small voice in little things; little indulgences of the flesh to the neglect of duty; little strokes of policy; doing evil in the little things that good may come and the beauty, and the fruitfulness of the vine are sacrificed!”
We must constantly be on the lookout for the invaders. Be vigilant! Once we identify them and take them seriously as a threat, recognize them as sin and repent, we must navigate forgiveness between us. After that, the key is teamwork. The couple must work together to battle the problem. One person can’t carry the entire responsibility for protecting against the sinfulness that corrupts a marriage. Each must do his or her part. The garden of marriage has tender grapes; the relationship with our spouse is precious and vulnerable. We must work together to guard and defend it no matter what the cost. Our love for each other, our attitude toward each other, the care, devotion, grace, respect, forgiveness, and patience we extend to our mates, all demonstrate our commitment to fight and win against the enemy who is out to get us. A peaceful and blossoming marriage is a wonderful and mysterious testimony to a world who is always watching. It points to the faithful, unconditional love Christ Himself has for His bride, the church.
The weekend after the Wednesday night I began to think about these destructive little foxes happened to be our Marriage Retreat. While these little critters are out to obliterate any relationship, whether Songs is a picture of lovers or Christ and His church, I became laser-focused particularly on marriage relationships. I earnestly began to pray God wouldn’t allow foxes or anything else to deter our couples from coming to hear what He had to say to each of them at the retreat. I prayed that they would learn how to recognize and battle the insidious, relentless “foxes” in their gardens. I believe He graciously answered my requests.
At the end of the retreat, I once again prayed fervently over the couples, imploring them to identify and destroy the “little foxes” that have, uninvited and unawares, stolen into their marriages with evil intent. I prayed that there would be an imaginary pile of messy and bloody carcasses left behind in our meeting room when the session ended.
It was beautiful to see the couples around the room, some in tears, heads together, hands interlocked, crying out to God for their relationships.
Putting foxes to death.
And do you know how God graciously affirmed His precious couples on the ride home that lovely Sunday afternoon?
There was a very dead red fox sprawled out on the side of the highway as a poignant, symbolic reminder of what they had done!!
Do you, too, want to pile up some fox bodies? Do you want to protect your relationships at home, at work, at church?
Catch those little guys while you can.
Fight…and win!
—Eileen Hill
