Psalm 6
No, Lord! Don’t condemn me. Don’t punish me in your fiery anger.
Please deal gently with me, Yahweh; show me mercy, for I’m sick and frail.
I’m fading away with weakness. Heal me, for I’m falling apart.
How long until you take away this pain in my body and in my soul?
Lord, I’m trembling in fear!
Yahweh, return to me and deliver my life because I know your faithful love is toward me.
How can I be any good to you dead?
For graveyards sing no songs.
In the darkness of death who remembers you?
How could I bring you praise if I’m buried in a tomb?
I’m exhausted and worn out with my weeping.
I endure weary, sleepless nights filled with moaning, soaking my pillow with my tears.
My eyes of faith won’t focus anymore, for sorrow fills my heart.
There are so many enemies who come against me!
Go away! Leave me, all you troublemakers!
For the Lord has turned to listen to my thunderous cry.
Yes! Yahweh my healer has heard all my pleading and has taken hold of my prayers and answered them all.
Now it’s my enemies who have been shamed.
Terror-stricken, they will turn back again, knowing the bitterness of sudden disgrace!
This past week was quite difficult in a lot of ways. I don’t want to dwell on the details, but issues with my health and the side effects are reaching an overwhelming height. And this past Saturday was the height of it. All I could think about was that I want to go home, but there was a darkness about it as if the enemy was smiling. I was to run sound at church, so I was out the door early Sunday and on my way to the church. Ah.. A new day. Then these feelings of failure, frustration, anger were coming back, and I just wanted to give up. But I pushed on to get to church. I could just picture the enemy saying, “No. No. No. Don’t go there.”
While driving, I was praying and said to Jesus, “I wish you could sit here and talk to me.” As I pulled up to the church, it was early. Pastor George was in the driveway looking at something before everyone was showing up. He drove over to where I was parked, and he could tell by something I did that something wasn’t right. He jumped out of his vehicle and came over to me. We talked for a minute or so and he prayed with me. I told him what I said to Jesus just minutes before that, and George asked God to reveal Himself to me in the best way that He knows that I need to hear from Him.
I went inside and after a few minutes Pastor Greg was asking me how I was doing. I guess he sensed I had been teared up from the parking lot with Pastor George. Greg told me he would be praying for me. After the band practiced, we assembled at the front of the church. We always read a Psalm and have prayer time before the first service. We read a chapter a few times, pray it over the church, pray for the church. We started to read Psalm 6 around the group, and my verses were 6 and 7. “I’m exhausted and worn out with my weeping. I endure weary, sleepless nights filled with moaning, soaking my pillow with my tears. My eyes of faith won’t focus anymore, for sorrow fills my heart. There are so many enemies who come against me!” This was me. Exactly me. I was choking up in tears. The writer was right where I was. God was talking to me. The Psalmist goes on “Go away! Leave me, all you troublemakers! For the Lord has turned to listen to my thunderous cry. Yes! Yahweh my healer has heard all my pleading and has taken hold of my prayers and answered them all.”
Pastor Greg prayed for the people of the church who are feeling the effects of what Brian read. No one but God Almighty could have orchestrated the meeting between me and Pastor George in the parking lot and then to read the two verses out loud that I could relate to so well. As the service went on, I could see in the message if I was to give in to the disappointment that I thought would happen and the frustration of having to deal with my issues while doing my responsibility at the church, then that day I would have missed out on God revealing Himself to me, His answer to my prayer. I’m sure He won’t show Himself to me, because of Faith and Hope. As we see Jesus face to face, our Faith and Hope will disappear. He knows in this life we need both Faith and Hope, and until that day, I’ll have to be ok with that.
Yes, it was another day, a day where God showed Himself right with me. Through perfect timing, people, prayer, scripture, and a message. Through the church where I’m sure the enemy wants us to run from.
Lord, thank you for the blessings through Your power, Your word, Your people, Your church.
—Brian Rainey
*Please be advised that this blog represents the views, opinions and beliefs of the writer and does not necessarily reflect those of our church leadership or denominational affiliation.